... I have read many of the posts on this board but haven't seen one yet about a 90 yr old patient with advanced Alzheimer's who is obsessed with wanting to have sex with his wife. She is his only caretaker and is nearly worn out and this added pressure is nearly too much for her. She called me, a retired nurse, to ask if there was a drug that she could get from her doctor to make... (2 replies)
... We had discussed this long time ago in this board. No, you are not the only one.
Perhaps it is not so obvious. But my late father-in-law did want to have sex or have a girlfriend/wife with demand. Any lady at all, he wanted her! He was old-fashioned but we could tell it is sex he wanted - he wanted his late wife back but he asked for other ladies. He was in the late 80s and... (2 replies)
... As far as I know there is no approved medication that can be given to curb the libido. I know it can be a frustrating problem but redirection is the best option.
Reduced sex drive is a side effect of some medications. Prozac, Zoloft, and other selective serotonin reuptake inhibitors (SSRIs) improve mood by raising serotonin but they can also lower libido in some... (2 replies)
... Danny, I understand your situation well having been through this twice, with Dad and then with Mom. The nurse is absolutely right about some with Alzheimer's not feeling pain. My Mom was one of them. She had sever arthritis in her hands. but in the final years of Alzheimer's she never once complained or acted like she was in pain as before. She broke her arm and never once... (5 replies)
... I understand that you want to find out what happened and how she died.
Given Alzheimer's, I think she had lived a good life with your care. She probably didn't suffer much when she passed on the table. I know at times families want to find out what was wrong and who did wrong. But it is her time to go.
Please accept my condolences.
Nina (13 replies)
... He may not be dying but hospice can make sure he gets comfort care without aggressive treatments. Dehydration may cause UTI. He would need more water. If he eats less, he would have less water intake. Stopping eating is usually the last stage's symptom and the person may die from not eating. In a way he is probably in the latest stage of Alzheimer's. DNR is still in order - so... (5 replies)
... I'm so exhausted.
I have been running around to various facilities trying to find a place to move my dad.
We can handle the sudden recent increase in the AL costs. But, we CANNOT handle to continue paying for an additional one on one caregiver. We went from 12 hours, to 10 hours, to currently 8 hours. However, I don't see how we'd be able to cut back further.
I... (17 replies)
... My late father-in-law died before we wanted to start hospice. So I have no idea what hospice really does for a demented person.
What I learned is that taking drugs is not the only way out when the person is too agitated. There is also another way to cope: the caregivers need to be tricky with him and play with his fantasies and thoughts. Sometimes the caregiver needs to say... (17 replies)
... I guess I thought all Alzheimer patients become agitated. ... (17 replies)
I am sorry your Dad has been diagnosed with AD (Alzheimer's disease).
It is hard to believe in the beginning. My husband had trouble believing it too when his late father was diagnosed in late 2004. Hard to believe someone with PhD would get AD... Anyway, as time went, we did notice that my late father-in-law got worse and etc. He got worse every 6 months and... (3 replies)
... Exactly Concrete :) If you try to fight against her she will push back against you... and you will not win. She feels that you are not validating her reality or hearing her. We all need to be heard and validated... especially in the confusion of dementia. If she thinks you are working with her rather than trying to do something to her, you may get a better response from... (6 replies)
... Marianne, I so feel your anguish. I am presently in the same position with my husband. He needs help 24 hours a day as long as he is awake. I get very little rest and have limited help. Now, he's getting incontinent and hates wearing the diapers. The messes he makes are nowhere near what our kids did when they were toddlers. He is on the waiting list for the memory unit... (4 replies)
... Gogo, that is the way it goes with caring for a loved one with dementia. You sit in the doctor's office, they tell you your loved one has some form of dementia, they give you a pill, and tell you to come back in 6 or 9 months. There are centers for heart heath education and conferences for diabetes education and mentors for cancer education but nothing for dementia. ... (17 replies)
... I learned a long time ago you can't buck up against them and win an argument. You have to work with them and manipulate the situation to get what you want. My conversations with mom centered on what other people said, what the test said, what the doctor said. I told her I could get her an appointment with a specialist. She assured me she was fine and would prove everybody... (6 replies)
... Marianne, know that everything you are feeling is normal. Being human, we do that. We feel anger, resentment, guilt, love, compassion, and a host of other emotions all at the same time. This journey through Alzheimer's is not a sprint that we can dash through quickly. It is a long slow marathon that tires us to our bones and drains us of all that we have. We think we can... (4 replies)
... If they were diagnosed with early onset Alzheimer's, then the chance is higher for the relatives. Check with the doctor to find out about it. You may be able to test your genes. It is sad indeed, given early onset AD, there are more family members that can have Alzheimer's. They also have shorter life span for the disease (5 to 10 years.)
Nina (5 replies)
... (5 replies)
... Whiskers, it is hard to say. If it is the Familial genetically inherited form of Early Onset Dementia then there may be as much as a 50/50 chance. If one parent carries the gene mutations then you have a 50/50 chance of receiving the mutated gene and the probability of having early onset Alzheimer's is high. But you have a 50% chance of not having the gene. It cause can... (5 replies)
... First question I have, has your Mom been officially diagnosed? Does she have a current neurological evaluation? When you apply for guardianship you do need to insist that she have a current evaluation. Do not let it hinge on what might have been in the past. My bet, if she is as confused as you say here, that she would not do well on cognitive testing. If there is a good... (6 replies)
... Marianne...My heart breaks for you as I read your post. Please try to be easier on yourself. I admire your strength and perseverance for the care you've provided thus far for your husband. I have no doubt that it has taken a major toll on your own health (physical and psychological). Sadly, the disease will eventually alienate and isolate him from you (completely), and he... (4 replies)