It appears you have not yet Signed Up with our community. To Sign Up for free, please click here....



Relationship Health Message Board


Relationship Health Board Index


[QUOTE=liljo]but i want to do it again :S does this make me isane, i enjoyed everything about the experience ewhile it was happening it was so cool, i havent discussed how i felt as such but when he woke up and we were getting dressed etc 2 head into town i stated that if there were to be a nnext time that i wanted lotsa hugs afterwards cos i missed them
and he sed ok next time i'll sleep in the middle + u can share me

i've lost the plot havent i?[/QUOTE]

well i'm taking a different angle here. part of my history that almost happened taught me something

is your jealousy because of what happened, or how your boy was cuddling up with the other girl?

if it's the emotional intimacy (the most dangerous kind), and you both really want to do this again, talk to your boy (can you both be honest). see if this has confused his feelings for you..

then if your relationship is still strong, and you do choose to try this again, BEFORE the event, before the other partner is even chosen, discuss your groundrules... cover things like boundaries, like what your both comfortable with i.e. what he can do to her (if him doing oral is a special thing between you two, save it for you two only), what you can do with her, whether or not you expect equal or more attention from him during the event... how things are to go when they get wrapped up... i.e. state that you want him to be showing you the "afterglow" affection. also make sure you both agree that if someone isn't comfortable, all people will stop, not just the one that isn't comfortable. have a "bail out word" so that either of you can say it, and you both know to stop.

you might also consider doing this with someone your not really close with, so if things get strange, you aren't losing a long term friendship by distancing you and your boyfriend from her.

as much as my advice reads like a "how to make it work" realise that your playing with very powerful emotions, and treading a fine line... many people end relationships over this stuff, but a few add to the spice with no ill effects... it takes loyalty, trust, and a distinct set of boundaries
[QUOTE=liljo]but i want to do it again :S does this make me isane, i enjoyed everything about the experience ewhile it was happening it was so cool, i havent discussed how i felt as such but when he woke up and we were getting dressed etc 2 head into town i stated that if there were to be a nnext time that i wanted lotsa hugs afterwards cos i missed them
and he sed ok next time i'll sleep in the middle + u can share me

i've lost the plot havent i?[/QUOTE]

well i'm taking a different angle here. part of my history that almost happened taught me something

is your jealousy because of what happened, or how your boy was cuddling up with the other girl?

if it's the emotional intimacy (the most dangerous kind), and you both really want to do this again, talk to your boy (can you both be honest). see if this has confused his feelings for you..

then if your relationship is still strong, and you do choose to try this again, BEFORE the event, before the other partner is even chosen, discuss your groundrules... cover things like boundaries, like what your both comfortable with i.e. what he can do to her (if him doing oral is a special thing between you two, save it for you two only), what you can do with her, whether or not you expect equal or more attention from him during the event... how things are to go when they get wrapped up... i.e. state that you want him to be showing you the "afterglow" affection. also make sure you both agree that if someone isn't comfortable, all people will stop, not just the one that isn't comfortable. have a "bail out word" so that either of you can say it, and you both know to stop.

you might also consider doing this with someone your not really close with, so if things get strange, you aren't losing a long term friendship by distancing you and your boyfriend from her.

as much as my advice reads like a "how to make it work" realise that your playing with very powerful emotions, and treading a fine line... many people end relationships over this stuff, but a few add to the spice with no ill effects... it takes loyalty, trust, and a distinct set of boundaries
[QUOTE=liljo]but i want to do it again :S does this make me isane, i enjoyed everything about the experience ewhile it was happening it was so cool, i havent discussed how i felt as such but when he woke up and we were getting dressed etc 2 head into town i stated that if there were to be a nnext time that i wanted lotsa hugs afterwards cos i missed them
and he sed ok next time i'll sleep in the middle + u can share me

i've lost the plot havent i?[/QUOTE]

well i'm taking a different angle here. part of my history that almost happened taught me something

is your jealousy because of what happened, or how your boy was cuddling up with the other girl?

if it's the emotional intimacy (the most dangerous kind), and you both really want to do this again, talk to your boy (can you both be honest). see if this has confused his feelings for you..

then if your relationship is still strong, and you do choose to try this again, BEFORE the event, before the other partner is even chosen, discuss your groundrules... cover things like boundaries, like what your both comfortable with i.e. what he can do to her (if him doing oral is a special thing between you two, save it for you two only), what you can do with her, whether or not you expect equal or more attention from him during the event... how things are to go when they get wrapped up... i.e. state that you want him to be showing you the "afterglow" affection. also make sure you both agree that if someone isn't comfortable, all people will stop, not just the one that isn't comfortable. have a "bail out word" so that either of you can say it, and you both know to stop.

you might also consider doing this with someone your not really close with, so if things get strange, you aren't losing a long term friendship by distancing you and your boyfriend from her.

as much as my advice reads like a "how to make it work" realise that your playing with very powerful emotions, and treading a fine line... many people end relationships over this stuff, but a few add to the spice with no ill effects... it takes loyalty, trust, and a distinct set of boundaries





All times are GMT -7. The time now is 03:35 PM.





2018 MH Sub I, LLC dba Internet Brands. All rights reserved.
Do not copy or redistribute in any form!