It appears you have not yet Signed Up with our community. To Sign Up for free, please click here....



Sexual Health - General Message Board


Sexual Health - General Board Index


In case any one wants to skip the long story my question is should I just get over his lack of effort and be happy that I am finally having an orgasm during sex after having nothing for more than 5 years? Am I being unreasonable wanting him to touch me or AT LEAST use the vibrator on me? Maybe I am asking to much? Do the majority of men even give oral sex?

The story...

My boyfriend and I have been together for almost 6 years and have been having sex for 5 of those yeas (we are each other's first and only partners). We are both 21 and live together during the school semesters. Sex with him has always been just...fine, intercourse feels fine but there isn't much else to it. I have been giving him oral sex since I can remember but he has given it to me 4 times in the 6 years we have been dating. Those 4 times he was down on me for less than 2 minutes each. I am clean, I am shaven, and I do not understand. He uses my underwear to masturbate so I know he doesn't hate the smell. And to be honest I have tasted myself and I do not taste bad! He claims to not like the wetness on his face but when i give him oral sex he will c*m on my face and he likes sloppy bj's with spit covering my face. Not to mention my blow jobs are 30 minutes plus. I realized a few months ago that I am not OK giving oral if I do not receive it so I have since stopped.

When I went on the birth control pill two years ago is when I started to really resent him sexually. It became difficult for me to get wet and although I mentioned this to him on numerous occasions he never showed much interest in foreplay. His idea of foreplay is to kiss me for a few minutes and suck on my breasts for a minute then he is ready to dive in. The problem is that I was usually not wet enough and the sex became so painful that I once cried out accidentally, as much as I tried to hold it in, and we had to stop for a few minutes. I allowed him to finish because I felt guilty but it was still painful. Since then we've had sex maybe once a month.

He has given me an orgasm only once in 6 years. After a long talk where I told him I needed more he rubbed my cl!t until I had an orgasm and I thought things were finally getting better. I know he has confidence issues about being able to please me so I thought being able to make me c*m would boost his confidence! I was so happy afterward that I was willing to overlook the fact that as soon as I finished he looked at me almost disgusted and asked what he should "do with this" referring to my wetness on his hand. Unfortunately my vag. hasn't seen his hand since.

I have started to become self conscious about my body and believe that he must find me disgusting to want to wipe his hand off the one time he played with me. I haven't been fingered in years and if he touches my vag. it is through my underwear. As soon as sex finishes he wants to get up and wipe off. He hates it when he pulls out and his c*m drips on to him if I am on top. He will literally get up as fast as possible to prevent this. Also, when I did give him oral whether he came in my mouth or not he would not kiss me afterwards. So if I gave him oral as foreplay I could forget about kisses during sex. The few times he gave me oral I practically attacked his mouth wanting to taste myself. I can't help feeling rejected and disgusting after all that has happened! Yet he assures me that he doesn't find me disgusting. I understand that some people do not like giving oral but is it to much to want him to touch me?

We have talked and he has made an effort to not jump up to clean off after sex but not much else has changed. I have to plan sex ahead of time and watch porn by myself so that I can get wet so sex won't be painful. I have told him that I have to get myself ready by reading porn or a sexy book and he pretty much leaves me alone until I call him over for sex. He has never offered to help me get ready or to engage in these activities with me. Sometimes I feel like I do not have a right to ask him for his help that maybe during sex we should just take care of ourselves but then I remember those long blow jobs and the many times I have made him c*m and the resentment builds.

During sex I now use a vibrator which he hated at the beginning. Now that I use it I think he feels less responsible for my pleasure. I am tempted to use my vibrator next time, c*m quickly and then get up, leaving him sexually frustrated like he has left me all these years. It has gotten to the point that if he suddenly offered I would feel to disgusted to allow him to give me oral and to uncomfortable to allow him to touch me. I would feel that he were doing it against his will.

So my question is should I just get over it and be happy that I am finally having an orgasm during sex after having nothing for more than 5 years? Am I being unreasonable wanting him to touch me or AT LEAST use the vibrator on me? Maybe I am asking to much? Do the majority of men even give oral sex?





All times are GMT -7. The time now is 04:28 AM.



Site owned and operated by HealthBoards.com™
Terms of Use © 1998-2017 HealthBoards.com™ All rights reserved.
Do not copy or redistribute in any form!