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Hi guys to all of you.

I am not really new here.I've posted a few times in the past but never came back here due to all the personal problems I've had.Before sharing my story I have to say how helpfull this place is for people to share advices or just to tell their story in hope to get some reactions.

As for my story...

I am 16 years old and have been dealing with acne ever since my 12th.The last 4 years of my life and probably more to come have been the most horrible years I've had to experience.Practically my childhood was taken away.I am sure noone will tell me that I am overreacting after realizing what a huge impact acne can have on your lifestyle and personality and you as a human being.

I know it's really stupid of me to say these kind of things but sometimes I really wish to switch acne for like another disease.Something inside, so I don't have to be ashamed of my own presence or skipping school or not daring to go anywhere.Just...this whole thing has affected my life so much that I've had serious thoughts about commiting suicide more than once.Especially when you are living in the world when you only count with a pretty face.No inperfection is being accepted.And I know that when it comes down to a question, everyone answers that the inside matters.But that's notihng more than theory.People who can relate to my story know that.They know that you are being stared in the store at your face like you've commited some crime.And the worst thing is..that we have no guarantee of when it will fade away.After all I've experienced I believe that to be able to heal acne you have to start from the inside and not the socalled bad hygiene you need to change.That's just ******** and a tricky way to make you buy all those advertised products served to you by models who've never even had one zit.

I've just recently thought about how it would feel to live the day with a clear face.I'd probably aim for more knowing that no comments will be made at your face.But that's probably a dream that I'll never be able to achieve.

I've also tried so many things on my face that it looks so tired and exhausted and red that I dont even dare looking at myself in the mirror in the daylight.Only when I'm alone, I close the curtains, dim the lights and look at the mirror while feeling tears passing my cheeks.

I've changed my food so dramatically that I only eat 'the good stuff' and only like twice a day.A salad from lettuce and cucumber for in the afternoon (nothing in the morning) and 2 crackers with a low fat cheese in the evening.3 liter of water everyday.I know that this is not enough but hey, what can I do? Everything else breaks me out.And maybe...maybe with this diet I'll have the chance of looking good in the summer which is knocking on our doors.Maybe then I'll be able to walk around the town feeling proud of myself.Maybe.....

I seriously don't know what to do.I have major problems with keeping myself off the junk food and sometimes i get these attacks where I just grab everything and eat it and regret it afterwards.I cant control it.Only afterwards by vomitting.Besides that, I always compare myself to all those celebs with the perfect skin.I've developed an inferiority issue in the last months and consider myself lower than the rest.

Please...I am begging you for advices in order to help me come out of this nightmarre.

Anything...just anything would help big time...

Thanks for reading.I truly appreciate it.

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