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Hi, I've been reading books......don't know how smart that is seeing as I have not been diagnosed but I'm curious about something I read. It said that a lot of adults with ADD tend to stumble across the subject and realize a lot of it fits them and then go on from there. Is that true? How many people have gone that route where you pretty much think this fits you and now you have to go the whole nine yards and get properly diagnosed? In other words, it was saying that many ADDers know they have it........they just have to go thru the whole testing thing to confirm it. If that's true.........HOW did you know? Is that a common thing......simply knowing that this is just totally what you are all about and maybe never knew it? What is the alternative? Can it be possible to identify so much with this and find out that a professional tells you no you do not have it and that.......what, you really are just stupid, lazy and immature and that you can help it?

I have an appointment with my primary care physician in a month to discuss a referral and I'm already worried that I'll be led down a long road of being either dismissed or being sent to the wrong place, etc. Does anyone have any advice for me?

I guess I'm just full of questions on the subject but I'm curious if a lot of people just know this is what their problem is and always has been. A lot of it fits me but I guess I always assumed it only applied to those who were "hyper" as a child or always getting into trouble in school. That wasn't me but I always felt different and as I'm getting older (I'm a 43 yr old female) I can really see the patterns and the inability to choose a vocation in life and to generally just "grow up" is really starting to bother me. I don't know if I'm simply lazy and unbelievably immature or if there's a reason why I'm the way I am and I can finally give up trying to be "normal" and just accept that I'm different and it's ok. I've always felt that way and to be honest, kinda liked the way I am vs how "they" all are but there are things about myself that bother me. Pretty much spinning my wheels my whole adult life being the main thing. I feel like I still can't figure out what I want to do......when I grow up......only I passed that age, chronologically, a looooong time ago.

I think I'm the type of person that, when I think I might have found the answer to what has been bothering me all these years, I'm really impatient to know for sure if it's me.

Sorry for the long post but I'll take any advice and comments. :)
This is our doctor's website. It isn't selling you anything -its just info and stuff about kids and adults with ADD and ADHD. I have a husband with ADD and a daughter with ADHD. Hope it helps!

[[COLOR="Red"]removed[/COLOR]]

Blessings,
Michelle
I don't know if this is the answer you are searching for or not but here goes:
I am 31 years old and have very recently gotten treatment for my ADD. As a child I did really well in elementary school, straight A's and such as that. Then in middle school and on I sucked. I went to summer school every single year just to move on to the next grade, failing grades, getting in trouble, skipping school, such as that. I got pregnant right out of high school so never went to college until recently. Oh my! My house got so chaotic and disorganized. Not that I ever was a very organized person but holy cow!
Anyway, I tend to avoid any kind of project that involves any amount of serious thinking. If I do start a project it rarely gets finished. I still need to put that second coat of paint on the kitchen wall. LOL
As far as little things that drive my hubby crazy, he will send me to get him something to eat or to WalMart( I like to go, go, go, he doesn't). I'll forget what I am supposed to get him. If I don't make a list forget it, even if it's just two things. If I don't write everything down that I am supposed to do in a day, I won't do half of it b/c I forget.
I was recently given Adderall as my prescription and it has already made a world of difference. I am slowly getting my home organized and clean. It was dusty and just messy and I didn't even see it. Now my eyes are wide open and I am appalled!
I can focus on my college courses and work and home all at the same time. WOW!
I am glad I was diagnosed and my world is now a calmer place and I love it.
Thanks for the replies. I'm not sure how to describe myself but I'll just post what comes to mind. As far as me in school......I was what you'd call a good kid but not that good. lol I was too chicken to really goof off to the point where'd I'd get in trouble but I got my h.s. transcripts and was just embarrassed at my horrible grades the last two years of school. I don't think there was an A or B to be found and yes, I could have done at least a solid B average. I just didn't care and figured it was chalked up to me wanting to be older and be out of school already so I didn't really pay attention or feel bad about it. I was one of those kids that was always told I should do better than I did and usually was in those advanced classes with older kids......yet I struggled and therefore figured I wasn't too bright. Not to be a smart *** but when I got out into the real world and looked back........I just wasn't maybe as smart as the older kids I was in class with but in the long run, still further ahead than I thought.

However all these years later........I never really furthered myself and I think now it's because I just felt like I had forever to do all this stuff and I know I didn't want to choose a path in life because........I could never decide and still can't. I mean it's a really big problem and makes me feel stupid. As in.........those voices you hear in your head, of the majority of people you know, that would all say "jeez, just PICK something" but having choices makes it harder for me. To the point where it overwhelms me and I can't do or pick anything. I'm like that a lot about many things.

I've also found that when I feel trapped, say in a job, I suddenly have all this inspiration for ideas on what I'd rather do......goof off way too much at a job for an adult (in my opinion) yet when I got laid off and had all the time in the world.......I suddenly couldn't get anything done. I've noticed that about myself......more time and I just squander it thinking too much and having a hundred things I want to do, have to do and should do and just cannot focus at all. I'll put things off to the nick of time with deadlines and I seem to need that to get off my butt even though it's dangerous to that. I could stress out way too much and possibly let someone down or at least risk turning in inferior work. I can't make myself stop doing that.

There are a ton of other little things I've noticed and as I've gotten older I'd almost categorize them as just immature. Can't sit still but yet I don't exercise. Can't sit still and get things done, one thing at a time.......I either have to go onto whatever project I get a notion to work on regardless of whether it's the most important one to finish at the time. I think I do that to avoid the ones that are the hardest for me to do......they take the most focused creativity. Writing, for example. It's fun and I love it but when I have to do it, I avoid it like a little kid. I also can get hyper focused and obsesses with another less important project and waste even more time that I might have regarding a deadline.

I could also never handle meetings at jobs and I never understood what my problem was. My eyes would dry out and I would get unbelievably paranoid and uncomfortable. I'd be worried that I looked like a goofball by fidgeting so much so I'd try twice as hard to hide it and that obviously would make me need to squirm even more. Yet I can sit in front of the computer or the TV forever and I think that must be because of 500 channels or an infinite internet. My husband always laughs at me because I can't simply walk and hold my keys or my cell phone. I have to always toss them in the air or fling them around and invariably drop them. He also says I really don't listen and/or pay attention. I know that I DO when I feel like it, when it's something I'm really into but obviously there are times when you're supposed to pay attention even if you don't want to and I can easily be thinking of a million other things.

I've daydreamed A LOT my whole life. I spend a ton of time in my own head, in my own world and really feel the need to do this as well. It's good to get out of my head I'm sure but that's my normal way of being. In order to be social, I tend to "perform" a lot. I was very shy as a kid but funny and I think that never went away. It makes me seem to be the life of the party but depending on who it is trying to describe me..........it's not really the case. I seem to have to be "on" or something.

I also remember two people trying to describe me a long time ago. I knew them both almost equally so it wasn't a case of a friend discussing me with an aquaintance but one said she couldn't get me to shut up and the other was shocked and said she couldn't get me to talk.

I have no idea if any of this sounds familiar to anyone and again, I apologize for the long rant. I just have so many questions about this and I know I've left out a ton of little quirks that I've read about it in ADD related material and thought...........jeez, that's a contradiction but I get it because I'm like that too.
Just thought of a big one....... I cannot fathom how to truly get organized or clean up clutter. My big thing or fantasy is to just throw it all out because to sort things and use the "everything in it's place" theory just baffles me. I crave it but literally don't know how to do it. I've told my husband and he finally gets it. I don't think I'm lazy........I honestly don't know how to be organized. I have my ways and I cling to them but either a bigger organization problem hinders me down the road and the tiny steps I did make, aren't enough or I just get into planning on being organized and for some reason, just can't get off my butt to do it. Horrible pack rat, too. I save things and just don't know what to do with 90% of them. Finding a home or a method to save certain things is a huge joy for me......probably because most of the time, I don't know where and how to organize crap. I can't throw all of it out........some things you really do need to hold onto. Makes me nuts.

Again, to whoever is reading, thanks for letting me bore you with all this.:wave:
I just read both of your posts and you sound exactly like me. Do you make noise such as tapping your fingernails on something and not even realize it until it is pointed out to you? When you fidget, do you know you are doing it? I did that stuff all the time and still do from time to time. As far as getting organized goes, yep, it's in your face but how the heck are you supposed to fix it? You think and think but everything except the task at hand comes to mind, right? Your job (no matter which one) gets boring quick and you want to move on to something else or else you're gonna lose your mind. It's a neverending cycle!
You sound like ADD for sure. See a doctor and get some help. It has done a world of wonders for me already and I've just been diagnosed in the last couple of weeks. Already I am learning how to organize my home. Already I see the clutter and am weeding through it b/c I see how pointless it is to keep it.
Some people won't agree with what I am about to say but I don't care really. Not being smart, I just know what's best for me and it's not best for everyone. I've tried all kinds of herbal crap to no avail. I tried fish oil b/c there's supposedly some big study that says it helps. NOT! Not for me anyway. Now everyone is different and reacts differently to different treatments but the two things that are truly working for me are a good doctor who listens and a RX of Adderall.
I hope you can find a good doctor and find a method of treatment that works well for you b/c it will make all the difference.
I too would like to find out if I have Adult ADD or not. I dont mean to hijack your thread or anything. I am terrible at planning, I have a hard time keeping on topic, and concentrating on one thing. I am a procrastinator. I am really bad at staying orgranized, and my room is a mess. I keep saying I will clean my room "this weekend" but it never happens. I have trouble getting ideas into words, and sometimes I have trouble communicating with people. I was never a bad kid in HS but my grades were poor. I went to summer school every single summer. I am going for a check up for my social anxiety with my family doctor next week. I am on Clonazepam, and it works great for anxiety. Anyway, I'll feel like fool bringing this up to him. I also suffer from depression which I will bring up to him also. I just feel like my life is crappy. ADD kind of runs in my family, my little brother had ADD and my dad has it too, so what are the odds I could have it? I had trouble reading this thread, theres just a lot of text and its overwhelming to me. I am a Male, 20 years old.
[I]>>>I had trouble reading this thread, theres just a lot of text and its overwhelming to me.<<<[/I]

lol, don't feel bad, I tended to ramble but I guess I just have so much I wanted to say. However, I do tend to go on and on. :)

Don't worry about hijacking the thread, I'm interested in what anyone wants to say on the subject.
Definitely talk to your Doc. You can search my old post but I was recently dianosed and sought help. Just to give an executive summary of what I was going through:
33yr male, married.
years and years of fighting with the wife over never ever finishing projects around the house (couldn't focus on the small details).
Couldn't balance checkbook or handle bills to save my life.
daydreaming all the time (really bad)
Figeting.
The more I tried to organize myself the worse I got.
I have a great IT job and I'm at the point where I just couldn't handle everything and organize myself. Frankly I'm suprised I never lost any jobs in the past but working in IT you get to hide out behind the scenes most of the time.
I was able to somehow graduate college but back in HS and college my pattern was doing well on tests and quizes yet always bomb long exams. No matter how easy the subject I just couldn't handle long test/exams. My SAT scores were only 820 and 850 despite having a 3.6 GPA in HS (with advanced classes). College was tougher but I managed to graduate with a low 2.0 range GPA.

My doc put me on Adderall XR 20mg. He was going to try me on Straterra put couldn't because I'm on Prozac. Straterra is basically an anti-depressant and may work for some people. Adderall has changed my life big time. I was finding out that it was wearing off after about 6-7 hours so my doc told me to take the XR twice per day when needed.

Good luck and keep us informed.
I have had ADD for 55 or more yearswas not diagnosed till 5 yrs ago
I've been thru a lot not knowing what it was
James
Hey, I just read your post, and it almost brought tears to my eyes. Some of the other post on this site as well too.


When i was in 8th grade, the school told me parents to take me to see a doc. The doc said i had ADD my dad thought he was an *** hole trying to take his money. I was also against all drugs at that time and didnt want to take anything. Now as a grown up 25 year old male. Im finding it hard to keep focused. YOUR STORY mimiks my own. I find myself doing the very same things. People often tell me i space out a lot. And i can sense myself going off to la la land when someone is boring me. I find when i write that when i read what i just wrote that im actually changing topic as I write and then flipping back without knowing it. At work i seem to place things in poorly chose spots then when its time to come back to it i got to spend 5 minutes finding it. Every job i have had ive been known as a smart guy who forgets lots of small things. I hate it. I HATE IT. I find it even hard to drive and talk to someone because i start talking and forget to drive. Im not going to rant and make this thread my own. I feel like I found a window. I want to get checked. YOUR NOT THE ONLY ONES OUT THERE.

Edward
hi. I am a 32 female and have had ADD my whole life. Organization and timley use of time if you will are the hardest things about ADD for me. There are lots of tricks I use but it took me YEARS to figure them out. Having ADD is one of the best things about me. Yes is it frustraing that I cannot make a decision on what I really want to do because there are too many choices. Yes Very, but I have learned to just accept it and enjoy the ride. I would go see a specialist for adult ADD. I have seen many doctors and specialists over the years some helpful some not so much. Its just finding what helps you cope and what kind of therapy or medication works best for you.
The thought of me having ADD never crossed my mind. I thought I was just stupid and slow. I barely made it through school because it was so hard for me. I was always called an airhead, ditz and dumb blonde. My therapist noticed the signs in me and tested me and then sent me to a psychiatrist for a more formal diagnosis. I take Adderall now and the difference is like night and day. I can actually think before words come out of my mouth. I can focus better.
I Just Found This Site. Wow! I've Been Reading All Of Your Posts, And It Feels Like I'm Reading My Biography. I'm 53 Yrs Old And Have Been Struggling My Whole Adult Life With Something, But Never Knew What! I Never Finished College, Because I Couldn't Decide On A Major, Or A Career. I Changed Jobs Alot, And Was Never Satisfied With Any Of Them. When I Was Working In An Office Environment, People Called Me Squirrel, Or Pack-rat Because My Desk And Files Were Always So Disorganized. Then I Got Fired, And Started Driving A Truck Over The Road And I Love It! I Thought I Had Finally Sunk To My Level Of Incompetence, But It Made Me Happy.

I Started Doing Research, And Reading About Add A Couple Of Months Ago And It Really Opened My Eyes. I Plan To Go In For A Formal Diagnosis Later This Month. I'm Nervous About That, Because I Keep Thinking What If It's Not Add. Does That Mean I Really Am Just Lazy And Stupid?

I Tried To Explain All This To My Wife, But She Seems Skeptical. I Have Trouble Stating My Case Sometimes Because I Have All The Arguments I Need In My Head, But It's Hard To Get Them To Come Out Of My Mouth In A Convincing Way. I Just Hope I Can Get Help With This Before I Wind Up Divorced!

I Have 2 Grown Daughters, And I Can See Signs Of Them Having Add Symptoms Too. My Oldest Has Been In College For 7 Years, Changed Schools 4 Times, And Majors More Than I Can Count.

Anyway, Thanks For Your Posts. I'll Keep Coming Back To Read More.
Listen dude,
All ADD is is the disability to distiguish between what you should keep and what you should let go. Doctors don't make this clear, it is very simple. So I speed up your brain with speed or whatever and you get everything. right. Wrong. It does'nt work that way. Focus is the answer. You can build the brain like a muscle, fill it full of positive thoughts. Find what interest you and attack it with all your capacity. take what your brain aquires from that and use it on the things that don't intrest you. I know it sounds funky but I've seen it work. Excersize your brain on the things that catch your attention, it works.
Bullwinkle,

I know exactly what you mean about being afraid that it's not ADD. As I mentioned before school was very hard for me so I didn't even attempt college right after graduation. I started it a few years ago and could only manage 1-2 classes at a time because it took so long for me to write my papers. A 500 word essay would take me on average 6 hours to write. My 9 year old will probably graduate college before I do! LOL! So after I was diagnosed with ADD ealier this year I was excited for fall classes to start so I could see the difference in my school work and attention now that I'm on Adderall. I was all signed and up and paid for and I chickened out because I thought the same thing you did. What if it's not the ADD causing my school problems afterall and I'm really just stupid. Then what? Even though it made no sense because part of my testing for ADD was ruling out any learning disabilities first and I had none but I still freaked. I regret letting my fears get the best of me and I'm going next term. Good luck at your appt later this month. Try not to be so nervous. It does sound like you have a lot of the symptoms. Let me know how it turns out. Take care!
[FONT="Verdana"][/FONT][COLOR="RoyalBlue"]Hi,
I was diagnosed earlier almost a year ago. I am 45 years old and mother of 3. My middle son was diagnosed when he was in 4th grade with ADD, my oldest son in 9th grade with ADHD and a mood disorder, and my daughter who is now 15 was diagnosed when she was 5 with ADD. I did alot of reading and found out it runs in families. My niece has ADHD, my mother who is 71 is hyper as Heck..lol..but has never been diagnosed. Usually if one of your children has it.. either you or your husband has it also. I had trouble also remembering things, had trouble focusing on people talking to me, I might be looking at them looking like I was listening, but I can tell you I was totally daydreaming somewhere else! LOL.. Ive gone through periods when I lose things constantly, car keys, purse, phone. The latest thing I lost a few weeks ago was my digital camera.. :confused: It was on the weekend and I was not home and for the life of me I cannot remember what I did with it! I am seeing a dr. now with my daughter and we both take Adderall. It has made the world of difference in my life! O yea, when I lost the camera.. was on the weekend and I dont always take it on the weekend. :confused: Before I started taking Adderall, I would not think before I would say things sometimes,I was very impulsive, forget things, start projects and not finish them, have to have a really good reason to get out of bed before 10 unless I was working. Like you.. I have always felt different and not as mature as those others my age. That doesnt really bother me as much though, because I think you are as young as you feel and Im trying to keep up with my 15 year old daughter! I dont like to sit and watch long movies on TV, my husband will watch "dual screens" on the TV, (2programs at once) and that drives me absolutely crazi! I cant sit and do that or watch it! So now we both are on Adderall and we homeschool! Everything is great and we get alot done together when we focus together! I also run my business from home and am doing well! Good Luck and I hope you get the answers you are looking for! Let us know! ;)

Blessings,
Robin [/COLOR]
Well, it was like looking in a mirror when I read all your posts!:eek:

I did start to list who had similar symptoms to me, but aspects of every single post had at least a part (or a lot!) of me in it!:dizzy:

I strongly believe I have ADD but my partner strongly disbelieves me, thinking it is an excuse for my procrastinating and disorganisation (he has his own mental health problems which means he discounts a lot of what I have to say). I am not diagnosed (but I am not a hypochondriac!), however, I want to find ways to help myself on a practical level, before I resort to a proper diagnosis and/or drugs.

If anyone has found any ways of coping, I would be most grateful if they could post them on this forum.
There are some things you can do to help yourself.... Make daily lists of things you need to accomplish.. this will help you to focus on the important things and mark off as you get them done. The list is a visual reminder for you.
To be honest I havent found too much I could do without the formal diagnosis.. I just didnt want to live my life in a "fog" anymore... and thats what it felt like.
Im MUCH happier and more productive than I ever was.. I dont care what some people think about medication... for me.. it changed my life!
My husband also pretty cynical when it comes to this.. even when it concerned his children.. but like your dear hubby... mine has his own set of "issues" he needs to address..LOL... I cant help him.. but Im helping myself and my daughter ! :-)

Good Luck!

Robin
[QUOTE=liasmom]There are some things you can do to help yourself.... Make daily lists of things you need to accomplish.. this will help you to focus on the important things and mark off as you get them done. The list is a visual reminder for you.
To be honest I havent found too much I could do without the formal diagnosis.. I just didnt want to live my life in a "fog" anymore... and thats what it felt like.
Im MUCH happier and more productive than I ever was.. I dont care what some people think about medication... for me.. it changed my life!
My husband also pretty cynical when it comes to this.. even when it concerned his children.. but like your dear hubby... mine has his own set of "issues" he needs to address..LOL... I cant help him.. but Im helping myself and my daughter ! :-)

Good Luck!



Robin[/QUOTE]

Thank you for your post liasmom, I will take what you've said and consider it seriously. There are some issues I need to deal with at the moment (re: partner). I need to deal with that first before I can see my way clear to doing anything else...!
Good Luck.. message me anytime...I wish I could have helped more!

Robin :wave:
Hi, it's me again. To make a long story short, I've had a few health problems that needed attention, including thyroid (suspected in being my problem but it's not and you can tell. I haven't had a thyroid problem my whole life so there ya go). However, the ADD concern was on the table and I finally had my first visit with a psychiatrist two days ago. I was terrified about the things I had previously mentioned...i.e. He would be one of those that thinks ADD is just bullsh*t or I'd be with someone who just has no clue and I'd be off on a wild goose chase of appointments and still not be with anyone that could just help me be sure.

He was fantastic and does sympathize and totally "believe" in ADD. He gave me one of those tests I have to fill out and bring back in a little less than 2 weeks. We talked a lot besides that but that is our first real step. I could have kicked myself for not just bringing the test in myself as I'm sure you all know the one I mean. I took it and thought.......oh yeah, this is me. I know ADD is me even without that test. That was one of my questions, initially, to all of you: Do you just KNOW when it's you? I think you've all pretty much answered me and I agree. You just have a light bulb go off over your head.

Anywho, I still feel that it's not a lay person's place to self diagnose so I wanted to deal with an educated professional. I'll keep you all posted but already I feel better because I finally get why I am the way I am.

To be honest, I like the way I am. I just find that parts of my ADD have really held me back and frustrated me but I feel that it can be a source of a lot of potential and creativity. You simply need to find the unique ways we all need to harness it all.

So glad I found out about this place and ADD in general. It's so misunderstood but when you got it...........oh you really do "get it"

I've noticed that some of us have almost the opposite problems as some others. That seems to be an almost confusing yet humorous side to ADD.
You either can't remember squat or you remember every little stupid and useless detail about something inane, ala Dustin Hoffman in Rainman. LOL

Thanks for all the input. I'll be back:)
Ok, I have another question for those of you with ADD who are more "used to it" or know more about it. I know about the lack of focus and having hyperfocus when either you've procrastinated so long that now you are under the gun and HAVE to get it done or you are really interested in something and can obsess over all the details, with total joy, for hours or days or whatever but what about not being able to do the things you want to do or should do (but still talking about things that you love only now you have to do a certain thing as opposed to only goofing off with it) and you just can't get off your butt? Is it lack of motivation, an inablity to figure out where to start, an instant aversion to even the things you love if they now have become an "obligation" as opposed to a diversion or is it something else?

Please tell me someone knows what I'm trying to describe.

I only hear about having a problem getting focused unless you're really highly interested in something. I'm not sure I get if it's ADD when you want to get things done but just do not want to focus on anything that needs to be done, regardless of whether it still is something you genuinely love to do. It's almost like I don't want to "have" to do anything but my god, that's pathetic. I only seem to want to do what I ........want to do. It's almost like if you turn a love or a passion or a hobby into something worthwhile, suddenly now that becomes torture.

Is it a lack of motivation more than ADD? Is that common with ADD or is that actually something completely different? It's unbelievably frustrating and makes me feel like such a lazy idiot.
[QUOTE=Lee74;2570497]Thanks for the replies. I'm not sure how to describe myself but I'll just post what comes to mind. As far as me in school......I was what you'd call a good kid but not that good. lol I was too chicken to really goof off to the point where'd I'd get in trouble but I got my h.s. transcripts and was just embarrassed at my horrible grades the last two years of school. I don't think there was an A or B to be found and yes, I could have done at least a solid B average. I just didn't care and figured it was chalked up to me wanting to be older and be out of school already so I didn't really pay attention or feel bad about it. I was one of those kids that was always told I should do better than I did and usually was in those advanced classes with older kids......yet I struggled and therefore figured I wasn't too bright. Not to be a smart *** but when I got out into the real world and looked back........I just wasn't maybe as smart as the older kids I was in class with but in the long run, still further ahead than I thought.

However all these years later........I never really furthered myself and I think now it's because I just felt like I had forever to do all this stuff and I know I didn't want to choose a path in life because........I could never decide and still can't. I mean it's a really big problem and makes me feel stupid. As in.........those voices you hear in your head, of the majority of people you know, that would all say "jeez, just PICK something" but having choices makes it harder for me. To the point where it overwhelms me and I can't do or pick anything. I'm like that a lot about many things.

I've also found that when I feel trapped, say in a job, I suddenly have all this inspiration for ideas on what I'd rather do......goof off way too much at a job for an adult (in my opinion) yet when I got laid off and had all the time in the world.......I suddenly couldn't get anything done. I've noticed that about myself......more time and I just squander it thinking too much and having a hundred things I want to do, have to do and should do and just cannot focus at all. I'll put things off to the nick of time with deadlines and I seem to need that to get off my butt even though it's dangerous to that. I could stress out way too much and possibly let someone down or at least risk turning in inferior work. I can't make myself stop doing that.

There are a ton of other little things I've noticed and as I've gotten older I'd almost categorize them as just immature. Can't sit still but yet I don't exercise. Can't sit still and get things done, one thing at a time.......I either have to go onto whatever project I get a notion to work on regardless of whether it's the most important one to finish at the time. I think I do that to avoid the ones that are the hardest for me to do......they take the most focused creativity. Writing, for example. It's fun and I love it but when I have to do it, I avoid it like a little kid. I also can get hyper focused and obsesses with another less important project and waste even more time that I might have regarding a deadline.

I could also never handle meetings at jobs and I never understood what my problem was. My eyes would dry out and I would get unbelievably paranoid and uncomfortable. I'd be worried that I looked like a goofball by fidgeting so much so I'd try twice as hard to hide it and that obviously would make me need to squirm even more. Yet I can sit in front of the computer or the TV forever and I think that must be because of 500 channels or an infinite internet. My husband always laughs at me because I can't simply walk and hold my keys or my cell phone. I have to always toss them in the air or fling them around and invariably drop them. He also says I really don't listen and/or pay attention. I know that I DO when I feel like it, when it's something I'm really into but obviously there are times when you're supposed to pay attention even if you don't want to and I can easily be thinking of a million other things.

I've daydreamed A LOT my whole life. I spend a ton of time in my own head, in my own world and really feel the need to do this as well. It's good to get out of my head I'm sure but that's my normal way of being. In order to be social, I tend to "perform" a lot. I was very shy as a kid but funny and I think that never went away. It makes me seem to be the life of the party but depending on who it is trying to describe me..........it's not really the case. I seem to have to be "on" or something.

I also remember two people trying to describe me a long time ago. I knew them both almost equally so it wasn't a case of a friend discussing me with an aquaintance but one said she couldn't get me to shut up and the other was shocked and said she couldn't get me to talk.

I have no idea if any of this sounds familiar to anyone and again, I apologize for the long rant. I just have so many questions about this and I know I've left out a ton of little quirks that I've read about it in ADD related material and thought...........jeez, that's a contradiction but I get it because I'm like that too.[/QUOTE]

I have enjoyed reading much of this thread. I’d love to respond to each response individually. If I tasted the tears streamed down my face while reading this thread, they would have tasted quite bitter sweet, because I was happy to see others share my same experiences, but also saddened, because the experiences are not ones I envy.

I believe your post, Lee, was informative, well-written, and on the informal side (but not in a negative way by any means) as it was told in somewhat of a story fashion.

I could go on and on writing a post, telling of my experiences. I have many thoughts racing through my head and do have a bit of a hard time organizing them, but being able to type rather quickly helps (about 50-60 WPM last time I checked…not too shabby with about 95% accuracy).

I believe I have a form of ADD and have some anxiety and depression, but believe ADD and anxiety are those of the most concern. Problems like these are usually intertwined, according to the behavioral doctor and psychiatrist I have visited.

First and foremost, not every single person with ADD is going to have the same symptoms. We have different temperaments. A quick example, although I am sort of picking on mentally impaired people, but having worked at a fast food restaurant and feeling like I was working with immature adults at times (sorry), I noticed McDonald’s weren’t particularly selective about hiring those who are mentally impaired, because they write them off on their taxes. One worker in particular who was mentally impaired had quite a disregard for the working space and had a big frame and would put his hands on his shoulders and extend his elbows out, taking up an already cramped working space in the back. That, and he was not very motivated and seemed quite impartial to his job, actually dropping tongs once and proceeding to use them for food (may be related to mentally impairment, so I apologize, but I thought I’d use this example to illustrate my point). To make a long story short, not all mentally impaired people are the same, some may be outgoing, some may be hardworking, while others may be shy and more laid back. Not all of those with ADD have the same temperaments. I’m not trying to further complicate the matter, but that is just one thing to keep in mind, since ADD more behavioral assessment in diagnosis, and not (conventionally at least) hard test in form of a scan (although there may be advances in brain scanning and research that I’m sure may show possible linkages).

Anyways, I find myself doing research, because I also find myself in the shoes of others in this thread. I have been diagnosed with ADD, some anxiety and depression and was told to consider taking Zoloft (anti-depressant/anxiety) but I’m not sold on it yet. I’m a bit frustrated, because the reason I went to the doctor in the first place was for ADD but ended up talking about mostly anxiety and a bit about depression. I was told by my behavioral doctor in a follow up appointment to call up my psychiatrist to tell her that I wanted to focus more on ADD, but never did, mainly because well…I am not afraid at this point of being told it’s not a problem because I have been told it is, but I just don’t want to bother calling someone up and leaving an important message. Sort of besides the point, but not with regard to the fear and having to really tackle this problem with ADD. I can also get extremely motivated in pursuing answers to my health and health problems, but then lose interest or focus when reading material or lose hope as a result of a lack of answers from doctors in the past and just failures from school in general (I’m sure ADD has played a part—will touch on this), lack of comprehension of medical terms or just getting overwhelmed at the doctor’s office when I do get some answers (and they turn patients in and out like we are a car in process on an assembly line---at least in some of my experiences with my HMO coverage if that makes a difference). Also, I just have general cynicism about the medical field in general. I know there are lots of great people out there, but it seems like it’s the “others” who make the world a bad place. I think doctors are always quick to provide medication and I’ve had that experience. The pharmaceutical companies these days are RAKING in cash by the barrel loads and medication to me would be a second or third option after at least trying something else or at least discussing some alternatives, not just medication.

Other common experiences I have had with those that shared and also experiences/problems I have:
-Disorganization, in many aspects. My room usually has notebooks on the floor. Those notebooks are usually not that organized, either. I have a hard time organizing for school. I have a hard time organizing my healthful matters (if that is a proper usage..healthful : ) I am daring..) I try to keep a health log and will try to record problems in a way that is easily reviewable and readable in the context of a doctor’s visit, but I think a helpful way to do this would be to just simply write a summary each month from a health log (I usually use a “Dayminder” log, and have used a “Daily” format, but I find I get overwhelmed if it is nothing but blank pages and lines and just text. I need separation and color differential to help me, personally (may be more exclusive to me and those like me and not necessarily ADD…the color differential part anyway).

-Indecisiveness—Geez…the decisions about what to major in college. This is therapeutic writing for me and feels great. I actually really enjoy writing and believe I write better than I talk, but there may be some problem with ADD and social settings and some anxiety. But trying to pick a major..it’s a scary thought and over about the last two, two and a half years alone, I’ve probably had about four to five different career ideas (police officer, photographer/graphic designer, restaurant management, psychologist, and now I’m not really sure…AGAIN…).

-I have a hard time with background noise and need peace and quiet and do have a hard time staying focused on my reading which is also tied to impulsivity (any luck with impulsivity and medication or other treatments???)

I will always find myself not wanting to throw something away, or thinking of reading say mail for example, another time, and just put it in my room on a dresser and junk collects over time. I will find myself say going around the house, put an object on say a table outside of my room, and then not remember where I put that object when I want it again.
[QUOTE=Lee74;2762001]Ok, I have another question for those of you with ADD who are more "used to it" or know more about it. I know about the lack of focus and having hyperfocus when either you've procrastinated so long that now you are under the gun and HAVE to get it done or you are really interested in something and can obsess over all the details, with total joy, for hours or days or whatever but what about not being able to do the things you want to do or should do (but still talking about things that you love only now you have to do a certain thing as opposed to only goofing off with it) and you just can't get off your butt? Is it lack of motivation, an inablity to figure out where to start, an instant aversion to even the things you love if they now have become an "obligation" as opposed to a diversion or is it something else?

Please tell me someone knows what I'm trying to describe.

I only hear about having a problem getting focused unless you're really highly interested in something. I'm not sure I get if it's ADD when you want to get things done but just do not want to focus on anything that needs to be done, regardless of whether it still is something you genuinely love to do. It's almost like I don't want to "have" to do anything but my god, that's pathetic. I only seem to want to do what I ........want to do. It's almost like if you turn a love or a passion or a hobby into something worthwhile, suddenly now that becomes torture.

Is it a lack of motivation more than ADD? Is that common with ADD or is that actually something completely different? It's unbelievably frustrating and makes me feel like such a lazy idiot.[/QUOTE]


I'd love to respond to everyone else, still. Don't think I was directing my comments at just you or suggesting you are inferior, based on an example I gave you. I know my comment was in response to your previous comment, but this comment here I am quoting now is somewhat relevant to the fact that not all those who have ADD are the same. This case is not necessarily "temperamental" though, but just keep in mind that not all ADD cases are the same (and I'm sure you know this..you are just looking for some answers..."Do I have ADD? If others have this problem, what the hale do I do?".

I actually do know what you are talking about. One area of interest I have is just that: motivation. One book I've read a few pages on is a bit too technical for my tastes, but maybe I just have to give it more of a try. It's titled "Human Motivation: Metaphors, Theories and Research".

Simple lack of motivation can be frusrating. I believe if you were less vague, others, including myself, could help you out more. If you could be more descriptive and give a few specific examples and what your thoughts and actions are. Without much else, I can't really give a great deal of advice on this post. Going back to ADD though, ADD may complicate the ability to get things done. Maybe there is something that your ADD (I believe you have ADD...don't want to assume though for sure) causes that complicates that task and makes it undesirable. Perhaps even that one task still requires organization. Thinking about it further, this may be where inattention and impulsiveness comes in and maybe even some hyperactivity. Losing focus easily and then impulsively retreating to something that is easier is a bad habit I have, say when reading challenging material, retreating to an easy to digest website, or the TV. I hope this helps a bit. I'm not greatly well read in ADD, but there is also AD/HD (attention deficity/hyperactivity disorder). Usually, there is diagnosis where one may have problems with attention, hyperactivity, or both.

I'll get back to you more on this one. Hope you are still around. Don't be afraid to share. We are all here to learn and help one another. :)

Don't give up, there are many others who struggle I'm sure with the same problems.

~Dave





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