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ADD / ADHD Message Board

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I am 23, and I was diagnosed with ADD when I was 15. I am no longer taking any medication or undergoing any kind of treatment...just trying to cope on my own.
I have been dating a wonderful guy for 3 years, and I feel horrible about this, but I have never told him about my diagnosis.

I didn't tell him initially because he seemed to like me just the way I am, with all of my quirks and flaws, and I didn't want him to think of me differently, or start attributing all of my personality traits to ADD. Plus, he has made some comments that make me think he might be one of those people who thinks that ADD is just a fad diagnosis that isn't really real, or something like that.

That was my initial reason for not telling him, but now my reason is basically just that I am afraid he will be mad that I never told him before, like I was keeping a big secret or something. He constantly jokes "you could get medication for ADD, I bet" or "you should be tested for ADD", so he wouldn't be surprised, and everytime he says something like that, I think "this would be the perfect opportunity to tell him," but then I clam up and get worried about how he will react, and I don't tell him.

It's not like there is anything about me that he doesn't know, personality-wise. He knows I am distractible, forgetful, disorganized, etc. And the diagnosis itself was 8 years ago, so I don't even know if it is that big of a deal that I haven't told him. At the same time, I love him so much, and I hate having any kind of secret from him. I am not the type to hide things from my loved ones, but I am just so embarrassed/worried to tell him, and afraid of how he will react.

Any thoughts, similar experiences, advice? I know I should just tell him, and it probably seems stupid that I'm overthinking it so much. But now I have built it up to this huge thing in my mind, and I am hoping someone on here can give me some perspective:)

Thanks in advance!

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