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ADD / ADHD Message Board


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Okay, here's my experience on holding back kids: My now 15 year old daughter was born in December. Her pediatrician told me to ask the kindergarten teacher if she is has developed enough to go on to first grade or if she needs another year of kindergarten, her maturity was important. The teacher suggested that she go on. Well, she was immature and the next year in first grade, she got way behind the class and could not sit down long enough to learn how to read and was failing miserably and was not learning how to read. That's when I found out about ADHD (at that time I did not know I was ADHD also [I knew that when I was little I was on Ritalin for hyperactivity but they didn't know about ADHD back then]. I took Chere' to the doctor and she was diagnosed at ADHD. Well, it made a huge difference for her and she learned how to read and caught up and did great. Then in 5th grade she started having trouble in math and her grades dropped. I asked the school to test her for disabilities and they did but they said she excelled in some and dropped in some but the average score was average. I asked them if I should hold her back to give her another year so she could re-learn that year and catch up. They said no, that would emotionally hurt her. So, against my good judgment, I let her go on. Well, guess what?? She went on to 6th grade and then 7th, but did so bad in math and some other classes that she failed, she needed to go to summer school for 2 classes so pass. I right then decided that she should have been held back in kindergarted, she was still immature and she needed to repeat 7th grade, not just go to summer school and pass 2 clases, so I let her stay back and now she's a freshman in high school and she's right where she should be emotionally. She's doing well. So from that I learned that each kid is individual and you must assess each kid. My youngest, who is 9 now was also born in December. Her teacher and I talked all year and decided that she was quite young and babyish so we together decided to let her repeat kindergarten and she's now in 3rd grade and right where she should be!!! You know your own child and if you feel he needs to stay back, then you make that choice, they will eventually adjust. Good luck!!! Sorry this is so long!!!

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