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ADD / ADHD Message Board

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Apr 18, 2003
Hello! I am new to this board and would like to introduce myself and my son. I would also like to hear from anyone who is diagnosed or has a child diagnosed with ADD w/out hyperactivity. First of all I would like to express my deep distress at finding the first few postings on this board by individuals who do not believe in ADD/ADHD. For all of us who have spent years listening to those who are totally clueless preach to us about what WE are doing wrong - the last place we need to be preached at is on a site dedicated to all of us who are challenged every day in ways we cannot even explain! So, please, unless you have some miraculous therapy or magic wand that we've all been praying for, I can direct you to another website where you can talk about us all you want, but at least we don't have to be there! Enuf said. Now,I would like to tell you my background. I have a degree in Child Development, a teaching credential, and a MA in Edcational Psychology. I am currently employed as the Director of the Teacher Credentialing Department for the College of Education at a State University. I help educate teachers, education counselors, school administrators, and special education teachers. I rarely come in contact with any teacher who tries to tell a parent that their kids need medication. In addition, I have two brothers who are physicians, a sister who is a psychologist and my mother is a nurse. My experience is that the medical profession does everything possible to avoid giving children medication for ADD/ADHD. There are extensive tests and counseling given.

I have two children. My daughter is 26 and sustained a severe head injury from a horse accident when she was 11. She had surgery to remove a large hematoma from the right side of her brain. The surgery resulted in a loss of her short term memory. Today, she is working on her Masters Degee in Sociology and is also a counselor at the unversity where I work. She is loved by everyone, has never taken drugs, alcohol or smoked. It was a long road to recovery, but we made it. So, for anyone who thinks ADD/ADHD is not a real illness and that we are all bad parents, you need to take a reality check! My son Brandon is 14. I knew he had some problems by the time he was 6 weeks old. Today, he is smart, funny, sweet, and the kind of kid that will never take drugs (even his dentist told me that!) or smoke or drink. But, every day is a challenge for both of us to simply get through the day. For kids with ADD, trying to concentrate and finish a task creates as much physical pain as a migrain headache or broken bone. Also, for kids with ADD, the meds rarely have an affect on them. There is still much to be learned about ADD - some researchers think there may be a link to autisim. Having worked with autistic children in my career, I do see similarities.

I love my son so much and yet every day I cry for him. I cannot be a stay-at-home mom, and he is too old for me to go to his classroom and help him get through a day. I finally had to take him out of the private school he was in because it is a high achieving school and without the ability to concentrate through the day, he could not keep up without constant coaching. He is now in public school and failing everything (mainly becuase he loses it or forgets to turn his work in). With the Bush Administration's herendous cuts to education, most programs that can help my son are being cut. I would love to hear from anyone who has a child (especially teenager) with ADD and hear your stories and how you cope. Sorry for the long post, but this is the first real support group I have found on line. There is one at the university, but the folks I'm in contact with either have very small children with ADD and are asking me for advice, or children with ADHD in which the meds do help.

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