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Badiou,
I have been on either "Dexedrine Spansule 15mg mfg Glaxo Smith Kline" and, with that
extended release capsule, taken, original Adderall 10mg, then, (total 25 mg in the AM hrs) then, 10mg of Adderall Instant Release, at 1PM, and, prn, if needed, (when I worked 2nd shift, or had evening University classes, as a non traditional student, would take a 2nd Adderall 10 mg by 5PM (Total intake usually 45mg daily) from 2000 until, around 2006. Prior to that, I was given the diagnosis of ADD 314.00, in June of 1994, and, took, either brand Norvartis Ritalin 20mg, on arising AM hrs, and, 20 mg after lunch, for the first two years, DX was made by a Psychiatrist my age 44 in 1994. "Methyphenidate, either Brand, or generic, gave me instant results, such, as goal attainment, graduating from a University, while working full time, within 1 year, due to my improved focusing and concentration ability, getting married, (my first marriage) within one year of my DX in 1994, and, many good things, getting certified in a foreign career field, after, another, one year of Construction Science, and, passing a challenging 7 hour General Contractors Exam by 1996. The methyphenidate, however, had such robust rises and falls, even with the addiition on year two of the anti-depressant Desipramine (Norpramin 25mg) I ask to change stimulants, due to more side effects.
Thus by 1997, year three, I changed Psychiatrist, and, I switched to 100% Glaxo Smith Kline products, being, two (5mg) Dexedrine instant release orange hearts at awakening, (6:30AM) and two more Dexedrine I/R 5 mg, around 10:30AM, total intake during 1997, 1998, AM hrs, 20 mg of pure Dextroamphetamine I/R, plus, at 1PM, after lunch hour, I would take one (1) GSK Dexedrine Spansule 15 mg ER, total daily intake, now, 35 mg. of a mix of I/R and S/R Dextroamphetamine. My last Psychiatrist, because my 97/98 Psychiatrist, moved out of state, in Jan 2000, was not fond of the "now" unavailable famous Dexedrine IR embossed E-19 orange hearts, thus, he switched me to two 10 mg Adderall at awakening 6:30AM, and two 10 mg Adderall (by patent holder, then, Richwood Pharma) plus, after lunch,but "no later than 2PM, one (1) Dexedrine Spansule 15 mg. during the year 1999, plus, a 6 month trial, of, Wellbutrin, 75 mg. by 6PM, as I worked a 40 hr week, plus, obtained a 3rd one year community college diploma, with night classes, for 12 months. Total intake, at age 50, now, at, 40 mg. of Adderall I/R in the AM hours, and, 15 mg. of sustained Release "Dexedrine" in the afternoon, total daily intake, now, 55 mg. of the majority of dextroamphetamine, along with the amphetamine salts, in the Adderall I/R "I never liked the Wellbutrin, and was personally very non compliant, to taking this, as it gave me a tightness in the chest, and, a mild, tachacardia, when I took, this, much milder stimulant.
I got a devastating Divorce, in 2006, that continued into 2007, and, was fired, from my job, and, the legal expense, reduced my status as a millionaire, by over 55%, plus, my wife of 12 yrs, out of spitefulness, not content with the significant financial settlement, had me under a Court ordered Restraining Order, for one year, with the threat of 90 days in jail, if I dishonered the Restraining Order, quite harsh, in North Carolina. I lost 30 lbs of weight, not intentionally, but, out of grief, and depression, from financial losses. My Psychiatrist, was aware, I was also being subjected to Extortion threats from two people, set up by my ex-wife. "something happened to me during 2006, and 2007, and, I got very anxious, on the ADD meds, thus, my M.D cut my dose down, to only a total of 25 mg a day thru the end of 2009. IMHO, just "burned out".
By the end of that year, I had regained my weight back to 205 lbs at 6'1" also reaching my 60th birthday, but lost another $700,000.00 (cut out of advanced inheritance, and, more annual income losses from holding 4,000 shares of Wachovia bank stock) and having to sell my 27 year old collection of 4 antique cars, to raise $$ to pay bills, in my upper class neighborhood. I do not rule out bankrupcy within 5 years........
Something happened again, as I am now working only Part Time, 60 days a year, thus, in the year 2010, thru, the end of 2011, my appetite for ADD meds suddenly increased, and, I have increased my dose, now, to 52.5 mg a day total, starting out with Generic
Barr Labs 15 mg extended release dextroamphetamine capsules, at the same time, taking 12.5 mg of generic Barr Adderall also at 9AM, again, a 12.5 generic Adderall at noon, and again, a 12.5mg, generic Barr Adderall 12.5 mg at 3PM. My Psychiatrist, added, one (1mg) of generic Actavis Clonazepam, with generic Actavis zolpidem (Ambien IR) at bedtime.
During my journey on mostly a "new life" of controlling my lifelong A.D.D. I easily met every single criteria for inattentive ADD, I have privately taken a brief vacation, from, the C-II stimulants, "once in Maui, Hawaii for 3 complete days, and all I had the energy for, was to sleep 12 hrs a day, or lounge on the rooftop solarium, my (then RN wife) was furious, at my vegatative state, threatening to fly back to the mainland, unless I took my meds, "I complied" .........when 7 yrs later, she hires a attorney, to divorce me, in february of 2006, when 6 weeks of marriage counseling fails, I resign my job with a shoe manufacturer, dating back to the Civil War in the USA, the firm had such longiviety, "I stopped taking all ADD meds, for 15 straight days, and was a "couch potato" sleeping, again 12 hours a day, walking around inside my home, unfocused, with no energy to even shave, but 3 times a week, and, felt like I met much of the criteria, of a 2 week Major Depressive Disorder. I had to return to the stimulants, as psychologically, I absolutely could not function, without taking the C-II stimulants, and my RN wife agreed,
I was a pathetic unenergetic, and very irresponsible, person, without the ADD meds. When I returned on them, I instantly, started focusing, on, my alternatives: I needed a attorney to protect my assets, in a "upcoming nasty Divorce, over money my wife expected me to pay her in six digits, and, with the C-II stimulants, I got hired, on a job, on the very first interview, as my energy returned, IMHO, as a result of the amphetamines in my body. (various SSRI's, Tri-cycle anti-depressants, even mood stabilizers, the alpha to the omega, had failed me, off and on since I was in my mid 20's.
Beginning this year, in 2012, my Psychiatrist, of now 13 years, has decided, to gradually reduce my intake of stimulants, already the dosage, to a max of 30 mg of
3 x 10 mg "generic Teva/Barr Adderall a day, and, the truth is, IT AINT't enough!!!!!
My Psychiatrist, has also, removed, the night-time hypnotic generic Ambien,and the
2 yr use of generic Clonazepam. He has observed, as my blood family has, (I had no children from the marriage) a often bitter, cynical, personality, with, some measurable mood swings, that, resemble, watered down "raging episodes" of Intermittant Explosive Disorder, and, technically, one cannot have both, ADD, ADHD and "that type of temper tandrum". My Psychatrist, has also added to my diagnosis, the dual diagnosis of Bipolar
Disorder, last episode, undefined. I developed "hives" during Divorce, thus, take the controversial cortisteroid, Prednisone" for itching on my face, by a Dermatologist, IMHO, stops the incessant itching 100 days a yr, but has side effects of MOOD SWINGS, etc.
I am depressed all of the time, at the very least meet the criteria of Dysthymia, and, my history of being misdiagnoised, in my 20's and 30's, has exposed me to all of the
traditional medicines for Bipolar Disorder, with months of Lithium, Trileptal, Tegretol, Lamacital, Neurontin, Elavil, Triavil, Siniquan, Prozac, Zoloft, Effexor, Serzone, Remeron, Paxil, some very strong anti-psychotics, I hated, (traditional and atypical) prior to my 1994 diagnosis of ADD 314.00.
I am beside myself, this year, as, I have transformed myself into a very reclusive, eccentric, esoteric hermit......and, only because of some years of "underdosing" was I able to get thru the recent "Adderall nationwide shortage" taking, airtight, stored bottles, of some 5 to 10 year old "Dexedrine Spansules" kept in a temperature controlled dry environment.
Thus, my 1970's and 1980'a dx's of Treatment (refactory) Depression, and, or GAD,
Generalized Anxiety Disorder, caused me to lose a lot of years, over 40 jobs, and, 7 colleges, before I finally graduated, with a B.S in Psychology. I am miserable, with the
knowledge, that, I am taking about 45 mg. minimum of Dexedrine+Adderall, just to get out of bed, and function, when my Psychiatrist, desires me to limit my Adderall to only 30 mg a day, and is suggesting, we later cut back more, and switch 100% away from
Adderall I/R, and try only Sustained Release types of stimulants, "down the road".
I have been so frustrated, I have obtained, some short term relief, by self medicating, by adding, the benzodiazepine, Roche Valium, or Pfizer Halcion, either, from
buying/procuring these meds from tropical resorts in Mexico, while on winter vacation,
240 pills, from a understanding pharmacy and MD, or, from some occasional, online foreign pseudo pharmacies that ship the meds like Diazepam, Clonazepam, by Roche, or
Pfizer Halcion, or Sanofi Stillnox (zolpidem) to keep it completely off of this...........
THE PRESCRIPTION MONITORING PROGRAM, ACTIVE IN ALL OF THE POLULATED STATES IN THE USA. More disappointment, as, I am not benzo ignorant, and, many of the recent meds, I have received, have the active metabolite, but, are only about 20 to 25% as strong, as, the USA versions, my Dentist has only "twice" supply me with like one dozen USA Valium by prescription, or, Endo Percocet. or, Roche Valium, Pfizer Halcion, Sanofi Stillnox/Ambien, from a co-operating Mexican pharmacy and Mexican MD, at a very
pricey winter resort, like Cozumel, Playa del Carmen, Puerto Vallerta, or Los Cabos Mexico. (Cabo San Lucas). Lots of hoops to jump thru, and "expensive for real deal"
In some ways, now at age 62, I often truly regret, ever starting on the C-II stimulants, (I am convinced I have the disorder, mountains of records to prove it) but,
can't seem to function but only "half throttle" while on them now approaching 18 years.
does one on this board know of anyone "pooping out" on stimulants, after long term use?
I have never taken them to the recreational abuse levels of very high doses staying up for days, until only one year ago, I abstained from all alcohol for nearly 30 years, and, no nicotine since 1982. Only drink pricey California Red Zinfadel, in solitude, at night.
All research I find is on kids 7 yrs or younger, with 20 to 25 yr followups. One single study, I found, from Australia, of 50 patients, taking Ritalin or Dexedrine, for, "treatment resistant depression, on adults, (no average age was given) claimed, after, 57 weeks, of using psychostimulants, exactly 52% improved, in their lifting their unipolar or bipolar
depression. BUT I WOULD LIKE TO SEE THE RESULTS OF ADULTS ON STIMULANTS FOR OVER TEN YEARS, WITH A MEDIAN AGE, OF AT LEAST 40 YEARS OLD. (seams uncharted territory).........................................Any comments will be appreciated.





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