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ok i didn't explain that well. And now i have to go i'll try to summarize it.

I have ADD. been diagnosed twice. first off when i was 10. second time when i was 16.

i'm now 17 and the second time i was diagnosed i made all the arrangements with the gps/referals/paediatrician etc.
now this doc i saw was a private one so it ended up costing **** loads for me on my petty income, however i thought it to be worth it if this medication could help me right?

anyway long story short it didn't do much for me at all except probably kill a few more brain cells than i care to think about. thats because i was out of home at the time and i couldn't take it in proper dosages. what teen could under the circumstances? so i keep up this pattern for awhile on dexies & then later Ritalin, which i'm still on today.

sorry if i got off track there im really tired but theres one more thing i have to say. i'm sick of making up **** & lying to people. so i'm about to be honest.
You know how internet users in forums & chat rooms can basically choose any number of identies to become?

well i'm sorta like that in real life. Just a big fake.
One minute i'm a kid studying doing well with ambitions, then i'm a away buzzing on speed all night talking to myself, then i'm in 20 different doctors offices the next day becoming somebody new.

See i must have a poor identity real sense of sense.
thats why i have ADD, Bi-polar disorder, obsessive compulsive disorder, social phobia, body morphic dys, panic attacks/anxiety, aspergers, tourettes, etc etc....i have a different doctor for nearly all those issues.
& the ****ed up thing that i finally realized is that i can literally(is that the right word?) become someone with these symptoms on a given day, but i never know which one i'll be.

maybe im schizophrenic? not likely, i have been doing alot of speed. the symptoms are bound to be alike.

maybe i've that multiple personalty disorder or DiD as its now known. it suits me to a tee the only reason i have not considered it much is cos they say it is very rare. anyway i gotta go man. someone write back & talk

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