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Addiction & Recovery Message Board


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Lisa, Wish someone could answer that question as to what to do about him for you, but as you probably already know you're the only one who can make that decision. I hear you loud and clear and know EXACTLY what you mean. I have one of those tempers for a husband too, not to the degree you describe, not yet anyway. Our kids are younger than yours, 6 and 1.5, but just last night I asked why does there always have to be this conflict? I know we can't blame our addiction on anyone but ourselves, but I swear I wouldn't be so miserable and depressed if it weren't for him. I've been following your posts recently and you've been such an inspiration for me. I'm tapering now, or trying to but making excuses to stay at about 5 vics a day. I did great yesterday until we went to the school carnival and Mr. Impatient started his crap. I haven't read what your husband is going to court for, some sort of confrontation? That is a hell of a lot to have on your plate, but it doesn't mean we aren't responsible for our actions to others, especially our family. I say it isn't right and don't accept it as such. That is what my mother-in-law has done for her entire life and is still putting up with my father-in-law who does nothing but belittle her. I can't stand the way he talks to her. She has never stood up to him. I fight back everytime because I will not accept it. I know we need counseling, and when things calm down a bit in your life I think that could do wonders for you too. If it isn't feasable right now at least get a good book on the subject to help yourself. Ultimately he will have to agree to do something to change, and yes Anger Management classes would be a blessing at this house too. Please don't let him drive you back to the pills, you've come so far. I think I'm still using them as the consolation prize for having to put up with mine. I know he could be worse, he is a good provider and loves our boys but he is so hard on the older one. His career is going through some bumps and I know that adds to his stress level too, but not to the degree that requires his "sky is falling" attitude. I wish I had more time to go on, and better yet I wish I could give you some insight that would get you through this. Give it time, give it patience, but most importantly YOU HAVE TO GIVE IT TO GOD! One thing that I've found recently that definitely helps us get through disagreements is to write what you want to communicate to each other, pen and paper don't yell as loud and you can keep your emotions in check so that you completly convey your point. Try to do it with love, that is what brought you together in the first place and I'll bet if you look you'll be able to find it. Lisa, I'm sending good energy your way and as soon as I'm done I'll say a prayer for you ... and I hope all that read this will too, that is a lot of love coming your way! I have one stupid question ... is darvocet something you used to get off of hydrocodone? By the way, I ordered suboxone (buprenorphine) from an on-line source and have tried 2 mg a few days and it definitely works for the withdrawls and cravings. Mentally I miss the hydros too much, but I'm getting there. I'm going to continue to taper and then use the suboxone to get through the end. What you wrote about "loosing a love" really described my feelings in giving them up ... BUT I WILL DO IT, I've "lost loves" before and survived ... and guess what, it turned out to be a good thing. You're not alone, take care of you and lets try not letting them get to us today. God Bless!





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