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Re: Suboxone fears
Dec 12, 2003
Michelle,

I KNOW that if I got off of Sub, and I got my hands on Hyros, I would be eating them like candy just like I did before. I can't tell you how many times I tried to taper and I simply cannot do it. I have absolutely no control when it comes to pills (except Xanax) - NONE! Now, when I got some methadone one time, I was able to control those but only because it only took one 10mg to feel the high. Also, I had to make them last for 4 days to handle the W/Ds from hydros. I did o.k. that time but only lasted about a week until I took more hydros. I just cannot stay clean without the Sub. I know I've fussed about it but I know there are going to be side effects from anything you take and Murphy is right, overall the Sub has still been amazing for me.

You're right, I am doing so much better today. I have a work Christmas party on Saturday night and it's going to be odd me not having any drinks or hydros in my system... Everyone else will be drinking so I'm not sure how I'm going to handle the situation. I WILL be asked why I'm not drinking (even by my boyfriend) so I think I'm just going to say that I'm taking sinus medicine and don't want to mix them. What do you guys think? Is there a 'standard' response we are supposed to give when you stop using drugs and alchohol? It's sad though because never really had a drinking problem and would love to be like normal people and have a glass of wine but I'm WAY too scared to drink while on the Sub.

What day are you going back to your doctor? I would simply tell him that you have got to have the Sub to stay clean right now and that if you don't have it, you could end up killing yourself taking too many pills. I truly believe that about myself. If I wasn't on Sub, I would be taking more and more hydro to try and find that high. Again, my mother did the same thing and ended up overdosing and dying because she couldn't stop taking them. Once again, I'm not going to worry about taking it. I'm just going to try and live a normal life while on the medicine. I want to get to a point that I've heard other people on the board say 'I actually forgot to take the sub today'. I would love to be there and believe that if I continue on it and try not to reach for it out of habit, that I/WE can do it. Let's all stay strong and no matter what.... We cannot take any other opiates. We have the suboxone and that's enough for us right now. Michelle, tell your doctor that you have got to have Sub and Xanax and that you don't abuse the Xanax. I take about 2 mgs a day and I've been more than fine. (except when I take too much Sub) I don't even get extremely drowsy at night.... just a little sleepy after my evening Xanax dosage which is about 1 or 2 mgs. I've also noticed that I don't need my Xanax as much during the day as I used to. Please let me know how you are doing. You and others (Murph, Rockingham, etc) have been my inspiration and we all have to work to keep each other up!!!!!! I LOVE hearing from ya'll so please continue to keep me posted. Take care and also, how's your child with the flu? Has anyone else gotten it? I have an 8, 5, and 18 month old so I know where you are coming from.





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