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Addiction & Recovery Message Board

Addiction & Recovery Board Index

I'm 17 and was hooked on E for 8 months, at first it was the best thing ever for me, I would get out more, talk to more people, feel like i was top of the world, So me and my mates decided to keep doing

Every day for about 2 months we would do about 2 pills on average, and slowly it started killin you, but you would get Hooked and do more and more a nite to feed your buzz

1 night i decided to do 8, i was fine on 7, off my head, as soon as i dropped the 8th one something in my head just told me that I shouldn't of done it

I started to slowly mess up, my breathing was getting shorter and shorter, my heart was racing so bad it hurt, I started getting funny colours comin down my eye sight, everything wuld swerl around me, and everyones voices was drowning out, I was like a vegetable and then I panicked and thats the thing not to do on Pills because thats the first step to really harming yourself, I could feel my heart getting slower and slower and my breating gettin shorter and shorter, i collapsed in the high street outside a club of all things, nearly dead, i don't know to this day how i got out of it, but I ended up getting rushed away from the scene by my "so called" friends who thoughtit was all a joke, all the rest of that nite, I couldn't breath right i had stinging pains in my heart

Ever since that night i haven't been able to live a normal life and that was 6 months ago, my breating is heavy and short, i get heart pains a lot, anxiety attacks, panic attacks, I will play some Football (soccer), and jus check my heart rate all the time, I don't want to but i can't help it, I cringe when someone talks about Death something in my head would trigger and i would just think about it and slowly get scared of death, i have bad dreams of me dying all the time, I still smoke Weed but i don't have the high that I should because i just panic...

My parents know about it all but not in FULL detail because i don't want to tell them the full detail, they will be ashamed with me...I need medication because I had to leave school because I would just be angry all the time and not listen, and just have punch ups

I see people i used to do it with still doing it and i'm wondering if they feel the same as I do, but i'm not asking them because it's their life, E was so nice at one time that I do get the urge of doing it again, but i know i can't

Me personally i don't know what to do, I have a scan on Thursday because of panic attacks so i'm hoping for a positive result.

If i see my doctor, what will he most likely perscribe for me, what is the best thing for these panic and anxiety attacks

Any suggestion will be much appreciated

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