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Addiction & Recovery Message Board

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Over, thank you so, so much for posting! What an inspiration you are. My last mg of suboxone was on Sunday, so perhaps we are on similar footing? Right now I am mainly dealing with stomach problems. I was only on the suboxone for 1 week with a maximum dose of 6 mg/day at an inpatient detox, though, so I may be better off, perhaps, though I am also w/d from benzos as further explained below. I have 2 little ones 3 and under, so it was hard, but I do still have a spouse and the godparents stayed for the week to help with the kids. I have a sitter the first 3 days of the week, but you might not see as much of me the next couple of days, as I will be home alone with the kids. You are so incredibly strong to come so far as a single parent, with all you have been through.

BTW, I was previously taking, like you, at least 20-30 of the 10 mg hydro/day, but to tell you the truth, I was losing count. I was using so many OP's that I am thinking I was lying to myself and was really taking much, much more. I did manage to taper down from January to April to about 8-10 pills per day, and then jumped back up during the week before my detox. Our method of obtaining them was the same. I also initially began with pain issues. I am also detoxing from 2-3 mg of klonopin per day. I initially ordered that last year to do my own detox from the hydros and then started taking them and was afraid to stop because I had a seizure in the past, but never really stopped the hydros, so ended up on both.

The only thing I would ask you to reconsider would be attending meetings. You would never ever imagine me going to an NA meeting. However, I have found the right meetings and think they will be instrumental in saving my life, especially at first, as my brain "heals". I also found a sponsor who is alot like us, but it took me a few different meetings to find her. If you haven't read my saga of attending the least appropriate meeting possible, then let me know and I'll share. Also, out here in So Cal (yes, hi, I'm south of you) we have Pills Anonymous meetings, but they are pretty hardcore. I know that I need my prozac, darnit, and I am not going to risk my health and life just to be "pill-free", but maybe I just caught them on a bad day.

Thank you so much for your story, which helped me so, so much today. It sounds like you have the idea down, though, that we can only do it one day at a time and that is it. Forever is way too long.


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