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Addiction & Recovery Message Board

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Hey WD,

I wish they should shut down all OP (online pharmacies) and "internet doctors" bogus medical clinics. They are creating a nation of Vicodin addicts. All they do is practically hand out the meds to you. But then again, I had legit pain and my documentation for it was a couple years old, but they still accepted it. I was using 3-4 doctors and OPs at the same time! FedEX and UPS trucks were arriving every other day to my home. How pathetic a life I use to lead. AND NO, I will not tell you who they are! Not only that, I couldn't even care for my daughter. I actually live in So Cal, a student and a mother. I'm not in my 20s, in my late 30s.

WD, you were only taking 10 a day? You could have easily tapered and cold turkey instead of Subutex! Why did you decide to go that route?

I will be very honest with you. If I had to do it all over again, I would have been stronge, tapered or Cold Turkey. I have done tapering before and it does help tremoundously with withdrawls. However, You have to be STRONG. I apparently didn't last too long from being clean. But then again at that time, I wasn't taking 30+ a day. I was only at about 7 a day. I wasn't ready to quit.

The reason why I sound at times as an advocate for Sub, its because some people really, really need it. Addicts unfortunately have some many factors that have caused them to be addicts. If the Sub can save their life instead of ODing on 50 hydros, then obviously stay on the Sub.

It hasn't been easy whatsoever either way. When I got off the Subutex, (I dunno, maybe because I'm a woman) the withdrawls were two fold. It was hard! The withdrawls were longer. I suppose its because its long acting as oppose to hydros. Not only that, the Sub played mind tricks on me. It messed with my brain, in a weird way and I cannot explain it intelligiently. Michelle (john 3.) is right what her doctor said. It is a very strong drug. I CT before and the first day was bad, but I still went to a kids birthday party and survived it.

I have to be honest though that you don't sound quite like you are ready to quit as Michelle is. Michelle has been on this roller coaster a lot longer than I and she sounds very ready to be off it. You, however, haven't persuaded me yet. So you should stay on it until you are completely ready. You don't sound like you can taper off with hydros either. If you did that you probably will go back to it full force.

Don't worry about being on the Sub for too long. Stay on it and when you are ready to get off it, then TAPER off it. But to do a successful taper with Sub, you have to do it at the 36th hour and slowly let your body adapt to that , then lower your dose again. Look at TMB, he actually did it successfully without too much withdrawls. Don't be scared of it. If the Sub helps you stay off the hydros, then do it. When you are ready to quit ALL opiates , you will.

Another thing, stay off the Valium. Those are far more addicting. Before you know it, you'll be more in deep crap. Ask anybody here about benzos. They are worse than opiate abuse.

Its MIND over matter. As always in anything you do in life. You were 8 days clean before!

Take care and be strong. Post if you need anything. I'll be here for ya!

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