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Addiction & Recovery Message Board

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[COLOR=DeepSkyBlue][B]Thank you all for your help and support.[/B] I think he knows he is an alcoholic or he wouldn't have stopped for 3 years. He knows he has obsessive/compulsive tendencies, which is also a family trait. He just thinks he can control it. He is familiar with AA because of his mother and other friends that we have known that have become members. He did go through rehab and a "drying out" period for 30 days for cocaine, several years before I met him, but he claims he wasn't addicted. He said that it had become a problem in his life and his first wife put him in rehab. I am a stepmother of his 3 kids (including the 19 year old son) so my input in how he is raised is only taken so far. I have talked with my husband about what he is "saying" to our son about drinking with him while sitting around the house. His response is that our son is out there drinking with his friends anyway, and as long as he isn't leaving and driving any where, what is the big deal? It is causing big problems between us. More than he even knows. When he quit drinking for those three years, I was so impressed with his strength and commitment to it. Now that he has chosen to bring it into our lives again, it shows as such a weakness to me and as much as I love him, it actually makes me feel unattracted to him (it is hard for me to admit that) because he is being weak and choosing something for himself that he clearly knows bothers me. In other words, putting alcohol before me. I feel so selfish saying this, but it is how I feel. There are so many good reasons why he should put it out of his life and not any solid good reasons for it to remain. I do not have an addictive nature, so I don't understand it well at all. It probably would be a very good idea for me to join an Ala-non group so I can get a better understanding of this. Is my joining a group something that I should keep from him or is it something that I should tell him and be open about???? Again, thanks for listening (reading) and for all your advice. It is very, whole heartedly, appreciated.


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