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Addiction & Recovery Message Board

Addiction & Recovery Board Index

Well, unfortunately I can't give you much GOOD advice...because I'm right where you are now. I do suffer from a chronic medical condition in which I'm legitimately prescribed this drug, but what scares me is how much I actually ENJOY the feeling it gives me, the "false" energy it gives me, AND....the fact that I easily take more than prescribed. I struggle with this every moment of everyday...I try to cut down, and although I do not feel withdrawal symptoms, I feel tremendous pain. I'm a 31 yr old Mother of 5 young children, and I do a darn good job parenting them I must add...not only that, I am an active member in my church (which means absolutely NOTHING unless a person is actually in church for the RIGHT reasons, which I know that I am...because Jesus Christ is my saviour, my best friend, the one and only person in my entire life that has never failed me and has ALWAYS been there for me, etc...I could go on and on....), I also work part-time (but from home), and I have been considered "Super Mom/Wife" by many. I just feel like such a hypocrite...and I feel so very guilty for not being able to do all of this without my medication. I take many medications...not just the pain meds. Not including the pain medication, I take 18 pills a day just trying to get my health issue back into remission. But you know what?! Enough about me..........YOU are the one crying out for help, and I can guarantee you that you've come to the right place. There are SO many loving, caring, understanding people here that can and will help you by giving you wonderful advice, stories of recovery, stories of their own personal "hell", etc. I truly believe in my heart that God has put all of us here together for a help one another. I know that I spend EVERY evening on here, although I don't post that often. I'm still so scared to share "too much". BUT...sometimes that is the only way we can truly receive the help we need and deserve. Let me just ask one long have you been on the pain meds. total? And how long at the dosage you are on now? I've stopped cold-turkey several times now (to be honest, because of this major guilty conscious I have, I've never been on pain meds longer than a TOTAL of 4 months....and most of the time its more like a month or two...BUT...I know that can and will change if I don't get some things figured out soon). The reason I'm here is because I KNOW I LOVE these pills way too much, and like you said...I need them to function. I literally have to take them before I even get out of bed in the morning right now. Now back to getting off of them....that is actually the easy part. The hard part is staying off (and I actually argued with people in this very forum after my first experience of taking pain meds and then having to go cold-turkey off of them....I thought that once I got through the horrid withdrawals, then my life would be right back to "normal" again, and I would NEVER allow myself to overdo it again...boy, was I ever wrong). As far as withdrawals truly varies from each individual...according to the amount you are taking, how long you have taken them, etc. I've had times where I literally thought I would die, and then I've had times where I didn't really feel anything at all other than some slight insomnia and some occasional diarrhea. Just remember one thing, typically (at least in my case and some others here as well) the worst is over after 4-5 days. I usually feel the worst on the 2nd day, and then gradually get better after that. By the 5th day, I'm usually feeling just fine physically (now, mentally is another story...I tend to get very emotional, cry a ton, etc). Once again, it all depends on how long you have been using, and how long you've been at the dosage you are at now. I truly believe you will receive much better advice from others here that (God Bless them!) had taken these pills for literally YEARS, and had gone cold-turkey. I can't even possibly imagine. I know that you will get some responses from others though, and they will probably be way more helpful. I guess I'm just mainly rambling here to let you know that I do know your fears, and I do know the pain (mentally) that you are going through as well...and I also just wanted to reply to you so that you know that *I* do care about you! I know MANY people here are going to feel the same way. Just keep opening up to us, and leaning on us for's easy for me to say those words, but it's still hard for me to do. As long as YOU feel comfortable sharing with us, then you will receive so much love and support it will become overwhelming!!! ;) It's a good thing, though! You NEED people that understand you right now...and that is why I say you have come to the right place!

I have to apologize for rambling non-stop with this post~ haha~ I've literally wanted to just delete it and try again later, but the way my crazy life is, I probably would not ever respond if I waited. I just don't want you to feel like you are not going to receive support here, or that no one here is going to care about you....because I can GUARANTEE that you are already cared about just from your one small post. So please...keep posting, and lean on us. We are all here for you...and I just KNOW that you will receive a ton of wonderful advice and support.

Hang in there, and please......wipe those tears away and know in your heart that you are NOT alone anymore. I'm praying for you tonight...and I'm going to be following your posts, so please stick with us, okay?!
Hi Baseball-
Sorry to jump in..saying hello..and wanted to talk to you bout the sub(been on it for a yr.-no relapses-It you know..
id check out the sub option-short term detox/mait.-3weeks-3 months-or long term maitenance-depending how long you feel you need to be on-
It works well on hardcore dope addicts-so i know its gonna be a charm for norco/hydro etc.
The sub did save our(myself/husband)lives-we were hopelessly addicted to heroin for years-(introduced while touring in our band)-but suboxone didn't just clean us up-it changed our life.Because we didn't have to white knuckle thru each day-we were able to get right into life-he finished his degree/got his business going-moved to a great new apt-had a little$$/etc..
We were always functioning addicts-due to nesscity-kids/bills/car etc..but zero quality of life.
Depending on quality/cost of drugs we were slaves-robotic-living for the next shot.
Now-we are free of the life-the people that went w/ it-we didn't steal-or hurt anyone-but we lost our soul.Well its taken some time-but i can feel again-im writing music/poetry-reading-thinking-connected spiritually.
There are other options-it so personal-AA/NA is good-for many people-rational/smart recovery groups..
I do attend meetings on occassion-many of my friends are very involved in there groups-they do not consider suboxone being clean.
Thats subjective-cos i am not using/copping/etc..i feel its an option-medical treatment for a disease..say what you will-
I needed it-i am happy to be on it-
im not psyched about coming off it-but i know its not going to be as violent as kicking a dope habit-c/t..and ive done that many times-horrorshow.
NY-if you really want out there is a way-
*cold turkey*
you can do it-if you want to -really want out????
My advice-research suboxone-at least for detox-
I couldn't stay clean-either baseball-after i tried to detox-but detox-was just not doing drugs for a week-and kicking down my habit-
This is my first quality year of life in nearly 8 years of addiction-
thanx suboxone-
ggrl :angel:

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