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:wave: Hi everyone! I wanted to say I'm sorry for not being here for everyone. I had to get off for a long time because I just couldn't continue to 'fight' for why Suboxone was the right thing for me.... also couldn't stand reading all of the horrible withdrawal stories. I just couldn't stand it and as most addicts know, if things aren't pleasant and 'easy', then I just avoid and deny.

Anyway, I've missed everyone and I'm tapering from Sub right now. I've been pretty impatient and going from 16 - 12 was a struggle... but with the help of a friend, got through that part. Then, with the help of some 'higher power', I just ended up at 8 over the last week or so... no troubles really at all. I'm able to sleep now at night whereas I wasn't before. But I was fine on just 4 hours of sleep or so and that only lasted about 3 weeks.

I'm extremely determined to taper and taper fast. I've considered cold turkey... which I know would be hard. But so far, coming off of this hasn't been impossible. Thing is, if I could taper, I wouldn't have gotten on Sub in the first place. But I'm doing it, with the help of prayer and my friends and family. But right now, I feel really good about it.... And even when I did that drastic drop from basically 16 - 8 in just a few weeks, It has been extremely tolerable.

Don't think I don't realize that some people will come on here and say 'the worst is yet t o come' but I'm ready for it. Took some time off of work in the upcoming weeks which I'm hoping to be completely days clean from it. Then I'll have at least a week to recover from that part. I believe the mental aspect has so much to do with our recovery. If the will is there, then the desired result will occur.... period! And most of the time, with a positive outlook, I bet my physical symptoms will be tolerable... but like I said, I've taken time off of work, just in case. I've also started on ADD meds within the last few months and boy, what a difference that has made. It's amazing!!! But I don't understand the addiction aspect of the ADD meds as it gives me no 'euphoric' feeling, no 'up' feeling or anything.... just the ability to focus... but I'm on a pretty low dose. Anyway, take care everyonne ---- I miss you all and please pray that I will get through this.

I'm not concerned about using again once I'm off.... that is just not something that is even within the scope of my future.... just will not happen!

I'm happy that I got on Sub, happy that I was as vocal as I was about it on this board because I know so many that it has helped, and i'm very happy that God has spared me the 'terrible withdrawals' that people discuss.... I know I'll be fine. I used to be so sick from taking tabs..... I can handle this... honestly, I believe if I convince myself that it will be as easy as it has been to jump down so fast, with a litle discomfort for a few days.... then I can do it. And I'll be clean, and SKINNY!!! I cannot wait for the weight to just fall off --- as I know it will.... Cannot wait! Cannot wait to be free from another pill.... cannot wait!!!! Please everyone, let me know how you are. You don't know how many times I've wanted to come on here, but I just knew it best to stay away... and deal with my issues, fears, etc. by myself. And now I'm ready to come off and I pray that you guys will help me, and definitely pray very hard for me.

Thanks for everything and I hope everyone is doing well.... Lisa... did he leave? I hope everyone writes me and tells me how they are.... please do, I miss you guys!!!!

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