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Addiction & Recovery Message Board


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Hi - I am brand new to this board. I am so terribly embarrassed to actually be to the point I am. I have so many questions and I hope someone can help me. I have had an addiction to Hydrocodone for about 12 years on and off. There are times that I can go months without taking anything but for the most part that does not happen anymore. I continue to take them now because I feel like crap when I am not taking them. Some days I take 10 - 12 7.5 mg and other days I take 8 5 mg. There is really no pattern. I am going to start this Detox thing that I read on this site. Does that seem to work well? Like I said, I keep taking them mostly because I just feel so bad when I am not taking them.

While I am taking them, my body feels really bruised. I just have a bruising sensation all over. My legs cramp severely at night and my hands swell. Well, not really swell but it seems like I have a great amount of water retention. My eyes have yellow patches in them. I am constantly nauseous and have headaches and I itch!

When I stop taking them, I cannot sleep (of course I do not sleep when I am taking them either), my stomach cramps SEVERELY and I literally cannot get up and do anything! I have that little energy that I feel depressed.

Does any/all of this sound familiar? Everything I have read has said that you legs cramp when you STOP taking them but my legs cramp at night when I am taking them...very badly...like I am not getting circulation. When I get up in the morning and pretty much all day, I feel like I have done STRENUOS work with my legs. I just need some help. I am afraid that I have killed my body and it will never be the same. I am a single mom to a little boy, a full-time student (for teaching) and I work. I am afraid I am going to lose my life to this. I tell my son always that life is about choices...yet, I cannot seem to make the choice to get off this stuff and stay off of it. Can anyone help? Is there anything I can do to help with energy while I am getting off of this stuff? Is there anything I can do to help my kidneys after I get off of it? How long did it take to get it out of your system and how bad were your withdrawals?

Thank you in advance for reading this and trying to help.





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