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Addiction & Recovery Message Board

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Elvis1209 -

Hello, Strongwilled here. I'm going on day 23. I have said in some of my posts that people shouldn't try and substitute anything...that suffering the worst withdrawal symtoms is the best form of "therapy". If you ready my posts you will see my story. I was prescribed Xanex for anxiety about a year ago, I remember still being on my hydro when I tried it for the first time. I hated it!!! It made me so damn tired, even trying to cut the pills. She gave me a pretty high dosage (the 1mg) I cut them into fourths and they still made me tired. As of May 15th (the day I took my last hydro) I had about 57 of the 60 tablets left from over a year ago. I didn't even try them until last week (Monday) I was 2 weeks into no hydro and was reading over and over again how they helped with the withdrawals. I haven't been myself since May 15th (or maybe us hydro addicts just forget how it feels to really be "ourselves") funny how we say that when technically we HAVEN'T been our true selves since we first became recreational users/abusers of the drug. Anywho, tried the Xanex....again, only 1/4 of the tabets, knowing my body had been drained already from the withdrawals and didn't want to feel overly tired... I can't tell you with any certainty wether or not they helped with my withdrawals because I think I haven't been drug free for so long I forgot what being normal feels like. But I do admit to having tried the Xanex for withdrawal relief by the 3rd week. I don't like them and can't ever see becoming addicted to them. I've never been addicted to anything but the hydro. Highly addicted I mean. It's called a drug of choice. It's funny too because I remember a paticular talk show where it showed a woman highly addicted to Xanex (a housewife) and how she checked herself into rehab from them. She digatally recorded her diary and she was a mess the first few days. I had already tried these after seeing that show and was shocked someone could get addicted to those but I'm sure others are shocked that we can get addicted to hydro also :-)

I'm happy the treatment with the other has made things a little easier for you (you were up to taking A LOT)..... read my posts and you'll see my min. and max. also. To make what could be a longer post short...I still have 55 of the 60 tablets of the Xanex left and they are just sitting in my medicine cabinet. I haven't used these to help me get over the withdrawals and yes, even at day 23 into my sobriety... I still feel weird. I feel BETTER, don't get me wrong...but damn I miss those little yellow pills. I know people will say they don't miss them and don't think about them but I would really like to see who says no and who says (after 23 days of sobriety)....when offered one "what's the harm in taking 1/2 a pill... I've been good"...that would be the true test of strength for a true addict. I'll be the first to admit a single mother of a teenager (whom I adore) and a great career.... hell yes I miss the pills. BUT.... (again, read my posts) got to be a second job and too scary for me finding ways to get them. Your story was so full of comfort to me even though you are probably miserable. I would love to be a part of your road to recovery, please write me.... I want to help support you through this and try to be here for you even if only through this forum. I've done the "drug free" childbirth thing (my son came too quickly for me to get anything)... I've suffered through very painful things in life, but I have to tell you and everyone else, quitting the hydro was/is MISERABLE. I am taking a lot of vitamins and MAKING myself get up and do stuff. It's been hard. This past weekend, I cleaned for the first time in 3 weeks AND I washed and waxed my car. This is a person who is a CLEAN FREAK (my house is like a damn museum and sterile as a hospital) normally...and my car, every week I would wash and wax the damn thing...after quitting hydro c/t it took 3 weeks for me to do that. Yes, it was a little harder than being on the medication but not as difficult as it would have been the first 2 weekends.

Sorry for taking up so much of your time, just felt like talking and responding....lot's and lot's of luck and hugs to you and PLEASE keep me posted. My2kn is another I have "fell for" on this site just by his words. We need to support each other. Even with family and friends, nobody can truly understand how we feel unless they've been here with us, it stinks.

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