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Addiction & Recovery Message Board

Addiction & Recovery Board Index

I am so, so sorry that you are dealing with this. I just don't even know what to say that might even begin to make you feel better. There are many people here who have battled addiction, many others who are spouses of an addict, and also many parents who have watched and dealt with their children's addictions. You have come to the right place.

For me, it was my husband and two separate addictions that he was able to overcome and is now sober in all aspects. I thank God for that every day.

I know you are torn by the choice you had to make, but you have to put your foot down at a certain point. As hard as it was for you to leave that hospital room, I feel you did the right thing. It sounds like your son doesn't think he has a problem, or just point blank doesn't want any help because this addiction is controlling him. You can't do it for him. He has to be at the point where he truly wants to work on beating this addiction. You can't allow your home, life and granddaughter's welfare be turned upside down and inside out because of your son. Tough love is not only tough on the person with an addiction, but it's tough on those dealing with their loved one's addiction as well.

I had to tell my husband at one point in both of his addictions that this was it, there was a choice to be made and if he made the wrong one, he would lose not only me, but our children as well. During his second addiction, we even separated for several months because I wasn't going to be an enabler for one minute longer. Fortunately, my husband decided that his health and his family were far more important than any kind of substance. He chose to get clean and we are now enjoying a strong, happy and healthy marriage. He is a wonderful dad and husband. He has been sober for many years now.

I do hope your son will realize what is truly important and come to his senses sweetie. You will get so much support here. Keep posting, be strong and know that you are not alone.

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