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Addiction & Recovery Message Board

Addiction & Recovery Board Index

Hello D

Yes, my doctor is absolutley helping me with my taper. You ask if I found this an easier route to coming off... it is a route that I chose that is working for me. My doctor offered to put me in the hospital, but it was not what I wanted to do. A psychiatrist offered to put me on Subutex, another route off, but that was not what I wanted. A taper just felt most comforatble for me. Others choose other routes. You have to find the one that seems to best fit you. My hubby doles out my meds per the doctor as a safety net. I don't know where they are and I don't want to know.

Is complete honesty a necessity? In my opinion, absolutley. Without full disclosure, how can we get the best help possible? And the best help is what we need. I even fessed up to the doctor at the start that I had recently been using Nyquil as well as my meds and I told him because it just hit me that I had started using it every night to help me get to sleep and that I didn't have a cold everynight. Full disclosure.

D, I have no doubt that you are a wonderful mom and wife. Smiles. And I have no doubt how concerned you are about that. For a long time, the meds controlled pain for me and I did, indeed, function better for a long time. However, what eventually, and inevitably, will happen is that slowly changes will occur in us. As tolerance builds, more and more opiate is needed for the same effect. Then there comes a saturation point and suddenly the opiate is being used for much more than pain. And slowly, slyly, sneakily, it overtakes who we really are. I slowly began to retreat. More time alone. More time needed to rest and recuperate. It came to a point where the opiate put me into such horrible depression that I was no longer the functioning, hard working, fun loving person I used to be.

I guess the deciding factor was when I asked myself, "Is my life better on these med or off?" And the answer slapped me in the face. I didn't even have a real life on them. I was only a shell of who I had been. At my doctor's office that day, my decision was made. I wanted my life back.

I am getting my life back now. The depression is slowly lifting, I am starting to laugh again this week. I am starting to see a glimmer of "me" again.

Can you kick it? Yep, you can. Choose whatever course feels right for you. Know that it will be one of the hardest things you have ever done. Fight for it as though your life depends on it, because your life is exactly what the fight is about. Come back and post. Come back and share.

With all hope

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