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Addiction & Recovery Message Board

Addiction & Recovery Board Index

Hi Lou.
I know that feeling of desperation - I know it all too well. I am about 4 months clean from a Hydro/oxy habit of about 400mg/day for over 2 years. I stepped down to Tramadol, which is a synthetic opiate pain killer, for a little over 1 week then I quit completely. The withdrawal was bearable this way. I was able to care for my 2 year old daughter and go to school, although I was achy and tired and had a 2-day period of severe anxiety. But all in all, it was the easiest way for me to get off pills, and I'd tried going cold turkey 5 or 6 times with no luck. Now Tramadol can be addictive as well, which is why I only used it for a short period of time. But for me, Tramadol did not give me that 'high" I so loved the way that hydro/oxy did, so I did not crave them or abuse them the way I did the others. So it was easy for me to take only what I needed to ease the withdrawal and it was easy for me to put them down and not pick up for no good reason. Some people will say that taking Tramadol is swapping one addiction for another, and for some I'm sure that's true, but in my case it was a stepping stone, and it worked very well.

From what I can gather from your posts, you're having a hell of a time switching from hydro to darvo, and an even worse time tapering. So my advice to you would be to go see a suboxone doctor and go on that for awhile. You could try using sub for a short period of time and tapering off it over the course of 10 days or so, and if while tapering the withdrawals are so bad you can't function, you can stay on the sub on "maintenance." I know that a lot of people hate the idea of having to stay on sub long term, they feel like they are swapping one addiction for another, or that they are somehow a failure. But you have to look at opiate addiction the same way you would look at any other disease, and treat it as such. If you had high blood pressure, you would need to take medication to control that for the rest of your life, and you wouldn't feel guilty about that, would you? And as for the swapping one for another thing, at least when you are on sub you wont be abusing it, running out early, doctor shopping or buying it off the streets. It would stop you from "behaving like an addict" as some say, where you would do almost anything to get your drug of choice. You would be "dependant" on sub, not addicted to it (yes, there is a difference). And you would be able to function normally on sub, without taking the risks that we pill addicts take when we're popping an obscene amount of vicodin or percocet (like driving while impaired or in my case, shopping while impaired! God I spent a lot of money on impulse shopping when I was using!) But my point is, if you need the help of a maintenance drug like suboxone, don't feel guilty about it. Admit that you need this help, get it, follow the program and go on with your life. It will eliminate all of the bs that goes along with being an addict or trying to kick this horrible habit on your own.
Good luck dear!
I'll be thinking about you!

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