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Addiction & Recovery Message Board


Addiction & Recovery Board Index


Hi Isitme, (and of course it's not)

I must first say I am so very sorry you are having to deal with this. I am a mother of a 6yr old and cannot begin to imagine him using drugs, smoking a cigarette or putting anything at all harmful into his sweet little body. I shutter at the thought and my heart truly goes out to you. I cannot fathom the heartache you must feel, the disappointment, fear, and the tears you must shed. I can tell you recovery is possible, will not be easy, and will not happen quickly, which I can say with most certainty because I am an addict.

I can feel your pain because I am a mother, and I know what you deal with because I am the one who has inflicted that kind of emotional torment (as unintentionally as it was) to others.

It's very important to know how old your child is, what stage of their addiction he/she is in, what their state of mind is toward their addiction, and just a little more history overall.I would like to help from an addict's point of view. Sometimes understanding our thinking processes will help you in supporting a possible attempt at recovery, as well as give you some insight into what you might be able to do for your child.

There are two very knowledgable mother's here on the board you can gain alot of very helpful information, understanding and support from who I hope will chime in for you. They are Jules and ericsma. These two have been through hell, as I'm sure you have, and have a very good grasp of the addict and how to stay sane. You may want to look for their stories and read them and the progress their children have made. It's quite inspirational. I believe both of their sons have about 2 months clean.

I don't know how familiar you are with drugs, but you will see alot of people post about pain medication called hydrocodone. Also called vicodin, lortab, percocet....Hydrocodone is a synthetic heroin. In other words, it's man made, an opiate, prescribed. It's a clean heroin basically. Much of what your child feels, goes through are the same as a hydrocodone addiction. However, because heroin is a street drug and is cut with who knows what, it becomes a much more dangerous drug to get off of. The fact that it is injected just throws another obstacle in the way in that it intensifies addiction itself and is 100% deadly to come off of without medical attention.

I am assuming, since your child is shooting up, that addiction has been a part of his/her life for quite some time. Injection is a last ditch effort at attaining the 'high' 'you once knew'.

Without knowing more about the history of your child, or what's currently going on, I'm not sure how much I can help. However, I can tell you a few things that you may or may not already know. Your child will HAVE TO go into medical treatment in order to detox. There are many out there that may be accessed with or without insurance. An aftercare program is ESSENTIAL in the addict staying sober. Also available with or without insurance. I also highly recommend a 12step program after detox. There are, as I'm sure you are aware of, methadone clinics. This is a wonderful program for those wanting (I emphasize 'wanting') to quit heroin. Most are fairly affordable. Well, very affordable when compared to a heroin addiction.For YOU, I also highly recommend going to Al-Anon which is derived from the Alcoholics Anonymous philosophy. As a mother, you will find many other mothers there who are going through what you have, or have gone through what you have and are now witness to a miraculous recovery process. They have so much great information as to how not to enable the addict, support the addict but with bounderies, and they are a great support system to each other.

You have stated yourself, as have others, that no addict is going to get help until they really want to. I am here to attest that it is very true. However, we need nudges. Lots of nudges in the right direction. We'll get angry, say horrible things sometimes, threaten all kinds of mindless acts, but we need those nudges. And we think about them seriously no matter how much it may seem we don't. So don't let up on your child when it comes to talking about this openly. We also need limits, because we have no idea what that means. There are no limits to us. We will take advantage of, overdo, anything...just like our drug. We need bounderies and often are actually wanting them. We don't know how to set them for ourselves and are very thrown aback when limitations are set before us. But even if we aren't open and receptive to getting help right now, little nudges and bounderies are what eventually get us to the point of wanting help....wheather it be from a police officer, the justice system, a friend, a boyfriend, or ........a mother.

But most of all, if you want to help your child the most, you must take the best care of YOU you can. We watch closely, examples. Examples of those we want to be. It's so important too, that you become educated in addiction, the addict, and yourself. The better armed you are against addiction, the better you can be at nudging and setting those bounderies we need so badly.

I hope I could be of some help to you.
I wish you the best and look forward to hearing more from you. BTW..WELCOME!
Shay





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