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Addiction & Recovery Message Board

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Percocet Addiction
Sep 25, 2009

I am new to this forum and I am going through an incredible amount right now. I've read almost everything there is to read but I would love to hear some feedback from anyone who has experienced what I am going through and what I am about to get myself involved with.

Back in January of 2007 is when it all started. I had some real serious back issues and was prescribed percocet for it. Ladies an gentlemen, I was hooked right away. Over the next couple years I'd take percocet on an off whenever i'd go to the doctor I'd ask for another prescription and hope she'd give it to me. I was in real pain but I'd be lying if I said I wasn't also drug seeking either. Regardless, I'd get my prescription of 60 pills and be done with it. It never became an out right addiction until March of this year when I went to the dentist for a horrible tooth ache from a cracked filling and was giving percocet and an abtibiotic until the infection went away for me to get the root canal. From that point on I have been on percoet/vicodin. I'd go to my regular doc to get percocet and when it would run out I'd go to the other doc for vicodin and every time was an attempt to ween off but this drug (percocet) is just way too strong. I find weening off to be a literal impossibility. I knew I was in serious trouble in May when I went through my first true withdrawal from the drug. After the third day of not having any narcotic at all I finally went to the Doc and she gave me just enough for two a day for two weeks and then I'd go back to see how I did. Well, all summer long I kept getting more and more (you'd be amazed how persuasive you can be when you're in that office.) My Doc and I have reached a point where she isn't writing me anymore and this Wednesday coming up I have an appointment with the specialist who is going to prescribe Suboxone. Mentally I know I am going to need this drug. My only fear is that it doesn't work. Does anyone have any experience with this drug? Cold turkey is simply not an option for me. It's a dark, desolate, lonely, miserable, achey, cold, frightening place not having a pill to go to and I just know myself and I am going to want and NEED the Sub.

Finally I would like to say that over these past 6 months I can say that I was at least a "sensible addict" and what I mean by that is I never exceeded the so called 4000 mg a day of tylenol which I hear is what is really damaging in these pills. I've read how some people would take anywhere from 20-40 pills a day and my heart goes out to anyone who has struggled with that much medicine. Fortunately that was never me, thank God but I don't judge anyone who has used that much because this is serious stuff and I am afraid I might get to that point if I don't stop it now. I am afraid. I haven't told anyone about this and I just love percocet so much but am willing to try to suboxone and I only pray it works. It's so hard to admit but it's time to stop. What keeps me going is the knowledge that before I ever knew these pills I was an outgoing, friendly, loving and all around great guy who never needed a pill to live and genuinely enjoyed life.

Any advice, experience and guidance would be appreciated. I just wanna know what's in store for me. Thanks so much.

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