It appears you have not yet Signed Up with our community. To Sign Up for free, please click here....

Addiction & Recovery Message Board

Addiction & Recovery Board Index

Hello, my name is Ashlee, im 21 & a proud mother of a beautiful baby girl. Im new at this but i need help so i figured i'd give it a try. I have been an opiate addict {pain killers} for 9 years and a herion addict for 4 months now. Back in June of 07' my doctor prescribed me Suboxone. At frist i was on 3 8mgs a day. It honest to God worked. For the frist time i felt like i really had a chance of beating this thing. I ended up getting pregnant with my daughter and after she was born needless to say i relasped. Up until Spet of 09' i only used pain killers, In Oct i was introduced to herion. I was working at a night club and didnt have any pills, this girl came up and offered it. From that point on i was hooked, But it scared me so i went into a trement center in Nov 09'. i wanted it (herion) so bad though that i left in dec. But for the record, I believe that treatment centers (rehabs) really do help if you let them. I learned so much about myself but i wasnt ready. Finally in Feb 2010 i was ready, i went into a 5 day detox {detoxed off the drugs with suboxone} and moved in with my parents when i came home. Since then I have been taking Suboxone every day but i've been buying them off the streets {no insurance}, Like i said befor when i take it, its been the closes time in my life that ive ever really been sober. The problem in running into now, is that i need suboxone everday, im bi-polar, i have very low self-estem and deal with alot of depression. When im not not the on the Suboxone, i go thru mad withdrawls such as insomnia, mood changes, nausea, muscule & bone pain, extrem irritabitily, chills, sweats & horrible shaking all over my body. But when i take the Suboxone these things dont happen and i can wake up, take care of my baby and go about my day. My parents have been a great support system, and to a degree there very understanding, but they think its time for me to get off the Suboxone, plus i think because of the way i get them {off the streets} that they think im trying to replace one drug for another. My parents & i have agreed that they are to give me my medicine because i know for a fact i will just abuse it. But that has reached its ending point. If i continue to take the Suboxone {after i run out of what i have} then i can not live with them and i will be on my own. I know they just want whats best for me and they have been by my side every step of the way and i want to be completly drug-free but im so fresh into my recovery that i dont want to go insane and im terrified of the withdrawls. I have to be able to get up with my daughter and im no good to her if i cant get out of bed or im losing my mind. Im not sure what to do at this point so im asking for help, What should i do????
Thank you. * Ashlee

All times are GMT -7. The time now is 08:18 PM.

© 2020 MH Sub I, LLC dba Internet Brands. All rights reserved.
Do not copy or redistribute in any form!