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Addiction & Recovery Message Board

Addiction & Recovery Board Index

Well as some of you know, I am ready to go cold turkey starting Monday. I was off the oxycodone for 4 days 2 weeks ago but I had to go back on because I could not call in sick for work. I am on vacation so I have the time to detox myself and work on what I need to do to be successful.

Quick recap of my habit. I have been off and on ( mostly on ) oxy/hydro aroumd 50-80 mgs a day for 10 years. I went to detox in January and was on suboxone until August. I did very well on suboxone. I was at 1.5 mgs a day for most of the time.

I relapsed stupidly in August. It was something I could have avoided and in no way do I feel defeated about it and hopeless. It just made me realize what I have to do to further myself in sobriety, and it is completely doable.

I went to the grocery store tonight and got what I need. Gatorade, water, soups, fruit and oatmeal. Medication wise, I have ambien and xanax available. I have never abused either of these drugs and I take them so seldom. I actually do not like benzos at all, but I figure for a few days I will need to take them to get ahead of the anxiety and to help me sleep for just a little bit.

I am so tired of the opiate usage. I have not enjoyed it for the last year. Every dose made me anxiety riddled and brought my self esteem done to zero. I am looking foward in turning over a new leaf again and I am ready to work on my mental health during this time. I will be posting over the next few days to help me get through this difficult period, which for me, usually subsides around the 72 hour mark.

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