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Addiction & Recovery Message Board

Addiction & Recovery Board Index

Re: Drinking
Dec 7, 2002
You haven't said what your mother is addicted to but whatever it is, the addiction controls her. I have just told my boyfriend that I love him very much but that it would hurt me less and be better for me not to see him, as he still drinks.
I have kept hoping that while I have managed to stay with him, he would stop drinking (unlike your mother, he does admit he is an alcoholic but he won't get help).
You are very angry, hurt and bitter which is understandable but your mother won't face up to her addiction while you and your sister "protect" her from her responsibilities. You are aware of this, I'm sure, but I would suggest for yourself that you find out about addictions and how they control the person who is addicted and also anyone around them.
It does help to understand that the hurt is not so much personalised. From my own experience, it doesn't work to wait on the addict to change - you have to do it first and they MAY follow.
There is a lot of literature out there and I'm sure you have heard of Al-anon. I have read a lot about alcoholism and co-dependency and it does help.

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