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Alzheimer's Disease & Dementia Message Board


Alzheimer's Disease & Dementia Board Index


Yes, I sound like my MIL. LOL

Ok .. today I got a phone call from the ACAT Team (Aged Care Assessment Team) ... they [B]CANNOT[/B] offer any help other than the wound care nurse for FIL. Like [B]HELLO PEOPLE[/B]??

Anywayyyyyyyy............. :bouncing:

They have made an appointment for MIL with [B][U]ANOTHER[/U][/B] Geriatrician (this one I know, and he's VERY good but only deals with hospital patients) .. they are saying that MIL may be admitted into hospital on Wednesday afternoon (when she see's him) so as to 'stabilise' her med's. This will also include MEDICATING her and keeping her violence to a minimum. Perhaps ... it all depends. They understand she has 'public' behaviour and may be on her best behaviour .. they know it all .. every sordid little detail of what she's does and doing and and and and and and .............. the nearest 'safe' facility for her in her current state is over an hour's drive away from here. We have some major choices to make.

you get the idea.............

So I ring my BIL .... L answers phone.. I catch her up with the latest and she blows me away with "yes, but BIL doesn't believe the dementia ..he thinks its the aphasia and stress"

I burst out crying ...... for [B]F***'s[/B] sake says me ....... What's it gonna take?? (yes, swearing ... I would have made a sailor blush)

So I ring BIL .. and ... once calmed down .... caught him up with the ACAT conversation and then I said to him "I need to ask you a question, and I want an honest answer: Do you believe your mother has dementia?" and he said "yes I do. I just have a problem figuring out when it's the aphasia, when it's the dementia, and when it's stress" ...

Like ya can put dementia into pigeon holes .... like .. [B]GET A GRIP MAN[/B] !! But this [B]IS[/B] his mother and I do understand his emotions.

But I was polite, and 'calm' and responsive, and HE'S gonna take MIL to the geriatrician and I will meet them there (they need us both, me as carer, him as family). It's not going to be pretty, but then, that's what they want as well. They don't want her on 'best public behaviour' they want the under stress behaviour, because this is the way our lives are at the moment.

Then they asked me if I thought FIL was ready for a nursing home. I took a big breath and said YES .. but he will fight it. They said it's coming to a time where he won't have a choice. They are looking at the whole picture, and they prefer to talk to me because they get HONEST answers out of me, I'm not as emotionally involved as their sons. I understand that too, although it's hard when they ask for decisions and it's really not my place.

Sooooooo..........we sit.

We had ANOTHER incident with the Police yesterday which is why this is getting pushed along a bit faster as well ........ but TODAY she's a happy camper. It will be interesting shortly however, FIL is coming home for dinner. He's got a leave pass and he's making the most of it (and heard I was doing a roast .. my food wins everytime .. LOL).

Keep me in your prayers, because by golly I need all the help I can get.

I've also been informed if MIL has a psychotic episode this weekend, I am to pack her into the car and get her up to the Emergency Room and LEAVE HER THERE. Walk away.

Easier said than done .. but we shall see.

Hugs ........ I need you guys ....

Sally





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