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Alzheimer's Disease & Dementia Message Board

Alzheimer's Disease & Dementia Board Index

Well ..

That didn't go down too well.

Gerientologist said basically what we've been told before, he was just a bit more blunt about it I guess. He doesn't want to talk about details of messes, he's seen in 3,500 times, he's straight forward about what HAS to be done.

He said .... MIL has dementia. I don't care what kind, it's not important, what's important is she's looked after. We need to stop her med's, because she's not taking them properly anyway, they're probably doing more harm than good. I want to give her a Schzophrenic (sp?) drug (starts with an F, I can't pronounce it) a small injection once a week. We track her moods, and if need be, we gradually up it until we get an appropriate behaviour. OK?

Ok says us.

He continues: You also need to get her name down into ALL the nursing homes in this area. It will take 6 months or more to get a bed. Now if a bed comes up and you don't think MIL needs it, then you can gracefully knock it back. It doesn't take her off the list, but it's there if need be. If you don't need it, don't take it. It's your call. OK?

Ok says us.

Then BIL walked in. Gerientologist said PRETTY MUCH the same stuff and BIL said "You arrogant pig-headed *****, I am insulted by your attitude"

Ok ... all hell broke loose in front of MIL who by now has figured this is about her, and is feeling threatened.

BIL has either interpreted what was said to us differently, or something different was said to him. BIL believes everybody is trying to put his mother in a home NOW. Let's just get rid of her, and yup .. he's pissed off. I get it .. it's cool. What's got me is BIL saying "if THEY (me and crew) hadn't had moved in, things wouldn't be like they are now" ... meaning a) we've created this mess and perhaps b) other things would have been sorted.

We did manage to get to FIL and catch him up on our interpretation of what happened. Just after that, BIL turned up and we left them together. Alan's just gone back with a beer for FIL, and we're waiting to see what happens from now.

What was achieved?



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