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Alzheimer's Disease & Dementia Message Board

Alzheimer's Disease & Dementia Board Index

Hi - I am new here. I have been studying AD for a few years now, since my Father-in-law has dementia. That's not why I'm here. I'm here because I'm worried that my husband has early-onset Alzheimer's. He is 57. I've noticed changes, subtle at first, for the past couple of years. It's gotten to the point now where they are glaring changes. I want to say right up front that he has not been to a doctor with these problems. These are my fears and have not been confirmed. He still works. Thank God he's been at his job for so long that he knows it well. He has made some mistakes recently off and on, but nothing major. The problem is his memory loss and his personality changes. We have 2 teenagers and they are bothered by it too. Whenever we bring something up that has happened in the past, be it 2 years ago or last month, he doesn't remember it. Names of the kids friends, forget it. He doesn't remember. We tell him things and later on he doesn't remember them. It's getting worse. And his personality has changed too. It's also very hard to communicate anything to him for me and the kids. We'll tell him something and he asks us a hundred questions, trying to understand. It is so frustrating to us. I get so angry. Sometimes I ask him about his memory problem and he doesn't think he has one. He readily admits to things he doesn't remember and yet he says he doesn't have a problem?? I'm scared. I don't like this. I've always stayed home and raised the kids. Now I feel trapped. I want to get away from him - I don't like him anymore. I feel like a horrible person for even saying it, but yet, it's true. I don't want to take care of him when he gets worse. I saw what that did to my Mom when she took care of Dad for 6 years after his stroke. It almost killed her. I'm 52 years old. What kind of a future do we have? The kids can get out of here in another couple of years and have a life and I want that for them. I get so depressed about it. I don't want to take him to the doctor. I know the medicine is too expensive for us to buy and it doesn't help that much anyway. What can I do to cope with this?? I know too it may be something else going on with him, but he has all the classic symptoms. I know it's not simply a middle aged man going through some change of life here. I've known him for 24 years and I know something is terribly wrong with him. I needed to vent and thanks for listening. I know you'll tell me to take him in and get him looked at, but he doesn't think he has a problem and I also know how hard this is to diagnois. I also know we can't affort a bunch of expensive tests. Has anyone else seen this happen in a person of 57, and if so, what are the beginning stages like for you? I've read the stages, and feel he is pretty much in stage 3. I feel like I'm living with a stranger. Thanks for your thoughts (and prayers). cyt

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