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Alzheimer's Disease & Dementia Message Board


Alzheimer's Disease & Dementia Board Index


From what your describing and going through what I went through with first my Dad then 2 weeks after he died I recognized my mother had this horrrific disease, I believe he is entering the last stages. The medications at this stage are pretty much useless. When they stop eating or swallowing the next step is aspirating the fluid in the lungs. Mother died on 2/17 last month with the same problem. She was in a final stage with pneumonia. She was recovering from the pneumonia but took a further step down as they do with antibioticis and had been admitted because she almost choked to death. I'm writing very bravely here but it almost killed me going through this with her. Ofcourse they give you the feeding tube option but after researching that on every major case study done all over the world it was about the cruelest thing I could have done. Mother was dying. Her throat muscles were shut done they told me she would never eat or drink again naturally. She couldn't talk, or walk and nor do anything but lay there. She had a lift to move her from the bed to the chair...I even think her eye sight went at the end but somehow she spoke to me through them. I am still unsure about that. So why would I want them pouring this smelly horrible cream into Moms stomach that is pumped in at different intervals...causes the runs, also offers a 50% chance of aspiration again...infection in the portal...and it must feel like a pipe is up you. Would you anyone really want that under those circumstances. My mother suffered enough for the 5 years...partial hip replacement ...also and since there was nomore quailty of life this did not seem like a good decision. Tubes can help heathy people in many cases for various reasons I'm sure.
Up untill 78 or so she was a perfectly health woman and a beautiful classy woman that would have been mortified knowing she ended up like her beloved husband who she kept at home till he passed. She had plenty of help but it was a strain on her doing it. I can write a book about this disease. Mom was placed in hospice and it was the "Longest Goodby" 12 days but very peaceful. The saline even had to be taken off because her body shutting down would not process the fluid and it was starting to fill up het skin. Dying is a natural process in the end with this disease. I made the mistake of letting the doctors treat her pneumonia in the hospital a week before the decision of putting her in hospice. That most likely should not have been done under her circumstances. Rememeber with the artificial means they take today you can keep anyone or anything fresh and alive...but you must consider them first...remember they are barely living to begin with...they are "between life and death" in the end stages of this horrific disease. I say to you all that are going through this use the 7 stages as a guide....when they stop wanting to eat otr swallow it's nearing the end. The next stage is rolling up into a fetal position like a fetus. This disease will take them to that level. I miss her with each day and fought like a tiger to keep her going for the 5 years of her disease and my Dad too. He had it for around 8 years. I cry when I think of the pain of seeing two honest good people that cared so much for others and loved life end this way. I was lucky to have some loving good people help with both of their care. They both were in their own home. I could never have endured it doing this myself.





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