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Alzheimer's Disease & Dementia Message Board


Alzheimer's Disease & Dementia Board Index


Aargh!!!!!!!!!!!!
May 21, 2010
So - just when I **think** things are calming down...............***BLAMMO***!!! I got a call from the owner / caregiver at my DSD's adult family home the other day asking if we could meet to discuss some "issues." I've had a couple of conversations with her (the meeting is tomorrow), and I suspect they're going to tell me and my mom that they cannot adequately care for my DSD.

Problem? He refuses care from the husband and the other caregiver. Yup. Flat out - 100% - refuses. He's had several falls (what's new - falling has been one of his biggest problems with the frontal lobe dementia), gets up many times a night (they don't have an awake third shift person so this means one of them is constantly getting up to try to help him - oh yea - with the help that he usually won't take). Yup - I think an ultimatum is coming. I can't really blame them though. They are very conscientious people. What else can they do if he won't let them assist him? So - he's sitting around in wet Depends - falling because he tells them he's fine - doesn't need any help - next time they turn around he's trying to get up and walk and............you guessed it............falls.

So today we had doctor's appointments back to back for my DSD and my mom. I'm sure my mom thought this was a good idea at the time, but having appts for both of them was actually too hard. I'd rather just take my DSD when it's an appt for him and then be able to return him to the AFH, and accompany my mom for her appts - but s-e-p-a-r-a-t-e-l-y!!!!

Of course the doctor's office was running late............we ended up being there for over 3 hours. Just as we were getting ready to leave my DSD told my mom he had to use the bathroom. So she wheels him into the bathroom. The next thing I hear is a loud THUD and my mom screaming :dizzy::dizzy:

I open the door to the restroom - my DSD is in a **locked** stall - on the floor - basically sitting in his own poo:eek: Someone who worked at the clinic showed up immediately to help. Thank goodness (even though my mom yelled at her and told her we didn't need any help - didn't need any help??? Excuse me???) because we needed help! The wonderful medical person proceeded to get on the floor and slide in to help my DSD. Oh my.............what an end to a long day. And stay tuned for tomorrow. I think I may be touring nursing homes in the near future..................:mad::mad:





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