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Alzheimer's Disease & Dementia Message Board

Alzheimer's Disease & Dementia Board Index

Jun 14, 2011
My father-in-law has a good hearing. Now he does not understand the surroundings anymore. However if I made some comments behind him to my husband, he got confused and wanted to know what I said. When I talked to the caregiver about my FIL's walking with the walker (about slower and etc.) my FIL gets upset about me.

It is like I cannot talk in front of him or behind him anymore. I talked to my husband, not him. I have already tried not to talk to my FIL directly as he gets cynic at times. I asked him about his elder son who called him at times, he laughed at me thinking he has no such son. I asked if he remembers me, he goes like "ha, of course!" by looking at elsewhere...

The only thing I can do is not to talk at all in his presence or I need to say something very soothing or nice. Virturally we have nothing to say anymore because he does not communicate much although he can talk. He does not understand his surroundings anyway. So we leave him alone and he slept on his bench.

The whole thing seems to be his declining. It seems it is not really better as we still cannot say anything "negative" in his presence. But he does not care what other people say. When it comes to his family, he is picky.
Maybe he remembered the past when he and I used to have conflict over this ridiculous "working with his son" stuff. He forgot all the details but he still has the impression somewhat. Maybe I over analyze here. He just does not like to hear anything negative from us.

His hearing seems to be pretty good. It is not that he didn't hear me, he heard that I was talking negatively. I was sort of upset that he could not walk anymore. He really has stopped walking for real on May 2. He cannot use a cane and walk properly anymore.

It is a no no to say anything negative or embarrassing in his presence. I should have known. But I thought I was not talking to him anyway.

Some stuff never changes.


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