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Anger Management Message Board

Anger Management Board Index

I suffer from anger issues, I have all the symptoms of BPD, but have never been diagnosed, I wonder if any of the rest of you can relate. Normally I can manage it just fine, but I lashed out really bad at my mother yesturday for no reason. It was stupid, and I have NO IDEA where the sudden spark of rage came from. But I made her cry and really hurt her feelings. I looked like an idiot in front of my new Boyfriend and he admitted he was a little(maybe a lot) taken off gaurd at my sudden outburst. So I freaked my Bo out, made my mother cry and went home and "self medicated", and took out a bit of anger on myself.

I feel horrible. I know what I SHOULD have done, gone home and meditated and calmed down. Instead I allowed myself to get more upset and hurt myself, both chemically and physically.

I feel SO guilty for hurting my mother and so guilty for freaking my Bo out. Every time this happens I feel like the worst person in the world and wish I could just drop off the face of the planet.

How does everyone else deal with the guilt of a rage outburst? I can apologize to my mom, which I plan to do, and I already talked to my Bo about it, but how can I settle the feeling of guilt and worthlessness in myself? UGH! I just feel like a big piece of Scum! And I am so angry at MYSELF!

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