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Anger Management Message Board


Anger Management Board Index


Hi Windy!

I'm glad I was able to help in my small way. I think what hit me about your post is that you realize there is a possibility that things will not work out with your girlfriend but that you have to work on yourself. This will be a difficult time but I know you can do it.

The only thing that will change your gf's mind is when she feels she can trust you and that will take time. Again, don't focus on getting back together but focus on you. Improving your physical and mental health will make such a difference. Look around you...happy people are attractive, right? Don't try to contact your gf until you feel that changes you made are permanent. That may take several months.

Once you feel happy about yourself again, you might try calling your gf and asking her to meet you for coffee just to talk as friends. She will probably notice a change in you and may comment on it. You can tell her you went through counseling and your life is going good now. Leave it up to her to suggest a date.

If things end up not working out, don't beat yourself up about it. Sometimes people come into our lives for the purpose of teaching us a lesson. Many times learning those lessons is painful but when we look back, we can see the reasons for them and we're grateful.

My bf of 4 years broke up with me a few months after asking me to marry him. I was just devastated. Later, I could see that I needed to work on my temper and controlling stress in my life. When I met my husband, I was so glad things worked out the way they did because he is just perfect for me. I can see now that my ex bf and I would have never been happy together and if I hadn't made changes, my husband wouldn't have been attracted to me.

You have recognized your issues and you are working on them. That shows a lot of character. It won't be easy but pull out that strength I know you have.:angel:

Susan





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