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Anger Management Message Board


Anger Management Board Index


Everytime I go into it I just keep getting more upset and angry. I'll try to make it short.

I am finding out I have deep anger, and I don't know where it is coming from. I got married a year ago, and the anger started before that - I think - but it's kind of like the marriage is bringing it under a magnifying glass. The anger started when I was about 25, and I'm 32 now. It's killing me and others around me. I've never been a super cheery person, but I've never been known as a bitter & resentful person, until now.

Everything makes me angry. I'm so embarrassed to say that it has to do with some sort of entitlement thing, I think. Like the the world owes me for all the hard work that I've put in or the things that I'm owed or God forbid the things other people have that I don't. You could say that I'm some sort of jilted bride but I think it is more than that. I lash out at the people that I'm closest to, mostly, but I can also lash out at a store clerk, or when I'm on hold, or just when something is bothering me, and I can go from 0-60 in about 3 seconds. I have super high expectations and I am always getting let down if things aren't to my satisfaction, and so I feel like every action is some terrible calamity against me and then I blow up.

I've tried counseling, and it works for a little bit, but I've not found anything that I can use to deal with my anger that lasts. I end up just getting angry that I have to pay him copays, or that it's not helping, or when his secretary tries to schedule me for a 2 o'clock appointment I go nuts because I have to work all day and like a normal person. Or when some 22 year old walks off of college row and gets the same gig it took me 10 years to find, or when some 16 year old girl has better skin in her prom dress than I'll ever have. I can't even stand to be in the same room as my husband's neices because I don't have kids and no one seems to care, they just lavish attention on those girls like my (future?) kids don't even matter. My husband doesn't want to have kids with me yet until I fix my "anger issues" and has said he's scared I'm just going to be angry with the kids like I am with him all the time.

If I heard someone say these things I would think they were a spoiled brat. But I'm hurting and I need help. I don't know what to do. I'm so tired of being angry. I even have some quote up in my office that says, "Anger repressed can poison a relationship as surely as the cruelset words (Joyce Brothers)", but it doesn't make it go away. How can I make it go away?? Please help.





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