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Anger Management Message Board

Anger Management Board Index

Hi Mom, I like your idea about switching roles. In reference to Beachmom who uses a swat on the butt. My husband always encouraged me to spank and I tried it and it didn't work in my situation. It just made my oldest daughter angrier. Many adults have told me that spanking made them angry and was very disrespectful to them. I was never spanked. I believe that children need consequences every time for broken rules but I use sitting on the couch, taking away dessert, taking away allowance, we're not going on a planned outing, etc. And like you said, it has to be enforced every time. I feel that I get the most mileage of getting my children to behave by treating them with respect, calmly enforcing the rules, and interacting positively with them frequently. Anyway, Mom, why didn't you want her to wear the shirt? If you have certain clothes for daycare maybe seperate them out so that she chooses only from one area. Or take out two or three outfits and she chooses from them. Does she get consequences for hitting you? Yeh, everytime that I saw my children do a behavior that I didn't like I could trace it back to my behavior. I swear they learn everything from us! I wouldn't worry about daycare at this point. I think that when you get control over her behavior at home that she will behave better at daycare. She sounds very angry to me. I would just continue to tell her that speaking to people through clenched teeth is not acceptable and then tell her how she should express her wants and concerns (by verbalizing calmly what she needs). And of course try to stop modeling the behavior. I think that you can get her to change her behavior but it will just take time and patience to mold her behavior back to an acceptable way. I would have a lot of conversations about her anger and give her consequences for unacceptable behavior. Good luck to you.

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