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Hi I was wondering if what I have is really anxiety or something more serious?
Here is my story:

It started last February, I had a funny turn in a meeting at work, felt faint, shaky, dizzy and just really odd. I managed to get myself home, saw a doctor and he said I had a virus initially. Then a few weeks later I was at home one evening and had similar symptoms again. At this point they used to happen once every few weeks and the next day I'd be fine. Anyway eventually the doctor said it may be anxiety/panic attacks.
In April I had the flu, and when I got over that I went on holiday in May. I felt ill on the way there, dizzy and breathless etc but thought it would pass. Anyway it didn't pass, I was breathless, hyperventilating, feeling faint and shaky,depersonalisation, my heart was thumping etc. This lasted nearly all day every day for the whole weeks holiday. I even went to hospital while there to get checked over.
The did blood pressure, pulse, blood sugar, ECG, lung function test and all were fine. Anyway the next week I went back to work, I felt terrible for a couple of weeks and then it wore off again. After that I had occasional periods of feeling lightheaded, nauseous, and shaky but I haven't had a fully blown panic attack since May.
My GP wanted me to take Seroxat but I wasn't keen as I wanted to get to the root of the problem. I've always been an anxious person but never had this until this year. My mother died when I was 8, she was 32, I was 32 this year so my Gp thought that may ahve been a trigger, but I'm not convinced. Anyway I was referred to the national health for CBT, they said I wasn't bad enough for their waiting list so I had 8 private CBT sessions. This helped alot and after 8 sessions my therapist said I was ok not to see her again regularly.
Anyway I was ok for a while but since then I've not been so good. My symptoms seem to be changing, I've had no panic attackes but lots of breathlessness, lightheadedness, heart thumping, and occasionally I feel shaky. I also feel exhausted alot. The one symptom I've had alot is a discomfort in my chest and more recently stomach problems. I've seen my doctor so much this last year, almost weekly at times. I've had another ECG, another lung test and lung spirometry, I am waiting for a stomach ultrasound, I've had countless blood tests - all the usual ones and some rarer ones, and urine tests. I've had a CT scan as I've had bad headaches for 2 years. Everything so far is normal. My vitamin B12 level was low but several doctors have said it's not low enough for me top be anaemic or have problems and it's slowly going up on it's own. I have IBS and my Gp thinks I have polycystic ovaries but nothing that explains all this. They think it may be anxiety or ME/Chronic fatigue syndrome (which there is no definitive test for). Recently I just feel terrible, I'm scared to sleep incase I die, I want to lay in bed all morning and I have given up on doing anything. I've become really unfit too. I don't go anywhere much anymore. I missed 90 days of work in the last year and am scared I will lose my job. My husband is not that understanding either, he shouts it's all in my head. My Dad is understanding but that's all. Some friends don't want to know now I'm not well enough to go out with them.
I seem to worry over every symptom and imagine the worst, but it's so frustrating that no one can really tell me for 100% certainty what's wrong with me. I want ot think it's just anxiety but what if it's something else that they're missing. I guess maybe it's just become a viscious circle now.

Sorry for the long post, I've never got all that off my chest before. If you've got this far, thanks for reading.

If anyone has any advice/ideas or similar experiences I'd love to hear them.

Take care everyone,

Lisa





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