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Re: Major attack
Jul 23, 2005
The same thing just happened to me about an hour ago... I woke late and only ate yogurt then went about my day and it was a little past time to eat again and I started to kind of feeling a little anxiety, no big deal. So, I ate hoping that would help in case it was low blood sugar or something. Then I had to go to the store with my mom and while shopping I felt more anxiety for no reason at all.... It just came on hard all of a sudden. It was for sure not a panic attack which I have had in the past and am on zoloft for it so, I know the difference. It's rare for me to just have bad anxiety though. It's been a while since this has happened too. It worries me because I'm trying to go out and live my life which I haven't done in years till I recently (2 months ago) got on zoloft and had hope. I still have hope but I want to be able to travel, fly, walk through the air port without having anxiety come on like this. It's very uncomfortable. It's almost the same feeling you get right before you're about to get your butt kicked from someone huge. For me it's like that except for the racing heart and shortness of breath (i only get that during panic attacks). I checked my heart rate and it was about normal during the anxiety attack today so, I just don't get this? Why on earth would it come for no reason at all when I'm fine. I've planned a trip about 14 hours from here that is coming up and I'll be flying alone. I'd like to be able to feel OKAY at least during flying and lay overs and when I get there I'd like to feel at OKAY so, I can go shopping ALONE and when I have someone with me. I have someone new in my life that I really care for a lot! I don't want them to think down on me as a LOT of people from my experience do when they find out about this stuff too soon. I've had some people be ok with it to my face and then once away from me avoid me like it's catchy or something which feels terrible.
Can I live my life this way? I know I can.......... I can't give up....... But SHEESH! It's hard to even get a sentence out when you feel this way much less have a decent conversation.
Today, my symptoms were:
sharp pain at the center bottom part of my breast bone (turned out to be gas - later burped like crazy). Hot feeling in arms, tention in shoulders, slight feeling of something in back of throat, pressure in head (like when you have sinus probs or are on a plain), ears felt like they were poping, dry mouth, dizzy. The whole time I kept saying to myself, "I'm ok, this is just anxiety, it will pass, bla bla bla") But it just seemed to get worse, like my legs would give out so, I went to sit in the car and get hold of myself. I read a mag to get my mind off it and then finished shopping and we went home. I then felt like things around me were a little surreal for a little while (i guess from the shock of having this after not having it for so long). I have benzo's but never take them. I'd prefer not to take them for stuff I'd like to make simple in my lind (like shopping, driving) and save it for when I really need it such as big events or very bad stressfull unexpected things that come once in a while for example "car accident, family or close friend dies, etc..) The reason is because I don't want to get addicted to benzo's or get to where a low dose don't cut it anymore. I REALLY want to beat this crap and get over it. My mind is set right now to the point I never worry at all about panic. Maybe I need more exposure being out and about like at malls, etc..???
Any ideas?

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