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Hi Kate, I actually can (sort of) relate my current anxiety to events in my childhood. I've always been a somewhat anxious person, but it never became debilitating until I hit my 30s. Like you, I wonder if perhaps it is somewhat hormonally related. I had pretty severe cases of separation anxiety from my mom. First (going by what other people tell me here), when I was one year old and my mother left me to go into the hospital to have my brother. I had just started talking in full sentences and completely stopped while she was gone. Then, when I started school, I had a lot of trouble too. When I started full-time in 1st grade, I even had to take a pill in the morning because I had an upset stomach every day. I got over it after that (and went on to love school), but other things made me really anxious growing up that other kids would never have thought twice about. I too was the oldest and I definitely was the reliable one.

I'm not supposed to do too much talking to my Little Me yet. I'm just supposed to let her hang out with me for the next week (so we can get to know each other LOL) and whenever I'm anxious assign my anxiety to her. The therapist explained that because everyone jumps to help a young child who is hurting, when we hand over our anxiety to our Little Me, we will want to comfort her. I'm guessing, in so doing, we are comforting Big Me as well. It's all an interesting concept and I actually pulled out some pictures of me at five to help me with the exercise.

I'm actually feeling a little better since beginning therapy. I can't say that I'm really hungry yet, but I'm eating quite a bit better. The severe anxiety has been gone since I started the Remeron, but I don't really think the two relate all that much. I think because I actively sought help for the problem and was no longer entranched in it was all I needed.

I've been meaning to ask you a somewhat odd question...have you noticed that you have to urinate less since starting the Remeron? Before I started taking it, one of my health obsessions was urinary urgency and frequency. Now I'm finding I can go hours and hours without the urge to go...almost like I was in my 20s before I ever experienced anxiety. I read over the side effects thoroughly and I don't see that listed, so I'm just curious if it's just me. I seem not to be responding to the drug the way the majority of people do. Guess I'll have to mention it to my doc when I see her next week.

Oh yeah, and don't worry about taking an occasional Xanax to get you through the dosage increase. Being functional is more important than stubborn pride. I'm confident you won't turn to it unless you have to and you can't become dependent on it when you're only using it occasionally.





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