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Anxiety Message Board

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You have what many many of us here have, so don't feel your alone. Anxiety and depression runs in my family, all four of my sisters either have one or the other, and one sister has bipolar, so it can definetely be genetic. Which I am worried for my son, hopefully he won't get this horrible thing. I am 36, have always been afraid of dying (my mom died of a horrible cancer when I was 11 and have never gotten it out of my mind) and all through the years would worry over any health issue.
I am very very very afraid of the Dr.'s and recently had to go because everytime I was having my anxiety attacks this last year my heart would race and skip over and over. It scared me and then I couldn't get my heart to slow down for a long time. One of the Dr.'s finally decided to check it out to make sure it was just panic attacks and they discovered I have a fast abnormal heart condition (svt and tachycardia) so I now have to go through testing and medications. Which is interesting, because they are thinking that most of the time my svt comes on, it is when I'm stressed out, well when I go to the Dr.'s I would have an episode just going there. So I finally made myself go to the psychologist for help, to deal with my severe anxiety and also now for my anxiety over my heart. In the past it was always I was fine and it was just anxiety and the Dr.'s would tell me to learn to deal with my anxiety, now I have to deal with a real health issue and I'm very scared. It isn't a deadly issue either, and can be cured through invasive surgery if meds don't work, or lifestyle changes. However; I can't get past the "invasive surgery" phobia. I mean, talking about the Dr.'s or hospitals or procedures just starts me shaking and my heart racing. I have to go see my Dr. every week for a check up and every time I have an anxiety attack. This is crazy.
So, did I make you feel even a little better after listening to how "crazy" I sound? :) I am going to try taking Lexapro because I can't live like this anymore. I think health anxiety is one of the main things everyone on this board has. I hope you can go to the Dr. and I wish you the very best! Michelle

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