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I've been reading through many posts on this forum and am having hard time deciding which is the best course of action to take.

From all the information i have been reading about, I think i have Depression and Anxiety.
Lately i've been getting many panic attacks, I can't reason with anything, lack energy and motivation where most of the time i simply cannot bring myself to do things. I have a new relationship which I'm in constant fear of loosing and have acted stupidly, and when i think back, I can only relate it to Social anxiety.

I feel imprisoned. I made a big change when i moved from London to small town in another country to set up a family business. I deal with the public and often feel fearful of people, even people that I know well. I work with my family and i'm having dificulties relating to them. This may seem quite harsh, but I have moments where I cannot see my mum or dad in front of me, this rage builds up inside me and of course, i choose to hold it in.

The business is doing ok but it's as though it has taken over my life, and is interferring with other aspects. Therefore I've lost complete interest in it, and i've also lost interest in a couple of hobbies too. I have too many quiet periods, usually 3 to 4 hours daily when i have to attend the bar. It's in this quiet period when i'm at my worst. I have been this way for a whle now, but it's taking over me lately and I want out.

My concentration is poor, I'm irretable, paranoid and am a dangerous speed freak on the road. I want out and I'm doing a course in something else to get out of the business, but feel tremendous guilt for my family. This is gonna take some time before i can get out of here. It's just gotten to the stage where i'm thinking me, me, me, and I'm forgetting to consider others.

I need help, to get me through this period. What would peoples advice be? I have little proper time to myself as i don't have my own place so meditation would be practically impossible. Any advice greatly appreciated.

I'm sorry if this post is a little mixed up, I'm finding it hard to put things in proper order.





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