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Hi all,

I was diagnosed over the years with panic attacks, bi polar 2, and most recently depressesion. I'm on Lexapro 20 mg, 2 mg Abilify, 1 mg Ativan. each once daily. Depression and BP is better. Anxiety is NOT.

This is my problem and I sure hope someone can help or point me in the right direction.

When I was 22, I started college. It was terrifying for me. But I did it. One day, I fainted in class. No one knows why. It has never happened since but since then I becamse SO afraid of fainting that I dropped that class and eventually, out of college. For the next 3 years I developed a phobia fear of faiting and would avoid "inconveneint" places where fainting would be embarassing. [B]The fear ruled my life[/B]. I'd panic if I was somwhere that was not easily escapable: hair salon, interview, etc. Then one day, I developed a tic of sorts. I was frustrated over waiting in a long line and I remember zoning out and my head felt like it was shaking. Since then, back in 1998, it has gotten extremely worse. I became agoraphobic. I hardly worked. Interviews are horrible. It controls me. I'm now 38, been suffering for 16 years now. The tic happens whenever [B]I'm somewhere that I'm on the spot[/B] like an interivew or in group of friends. I cannot make eye contact with someone without my head feeling likes it's shaking. My whole body feels like it jumps if I do.. I'm very [B]easily startled[/B]. My cell phone will vibrate and I jump sky high. My thoughts race and I can't get them to slow down. This has reduced the quality of my life to nothing. Ativan helps but not entirely. I want to be free of this know it and understand it and to be able to deal with it and LIVE. Its so hard to explain to anyone what it is. I feel so embarrassed telling anyone, even a professional. None of my friends know, only my family. It's like tension that needs to be released and I can only release it through this tic. Please someone, help me, does anyone know what this is or what I can do about it? Thank you in advance, QT

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