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Anxiety Message Board


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Board Index > Anxiety | 0-9 A B C D E F G H I J K L M N O P Q R S T U V W X Y Z


For the last month or more now, i dont even know anymore..my life has been terrible! I never imagined anxiety and panic could get so out of control. It took me over a month of living a daily hell.. I've been to the ER 5 times now, tried to check myself in to an inpatient facility and was unable to get in to see a dr for followup the entire time. Each emergency visit helped a bit..meaning they did alot of blood work, alot of ekgs, and would give me a very small amount of either Xanax or ativan to get me by until i could see someone... (at least they thought they did) They gave me about 15 .25 xanax, and 6!, yes 6 .50 ativan. Sorry, but .25 xanax dd nothing and the ativan did nothing... so i had to double the doses and the meds were gone very quicky, and then...i couldnt sleep, wake up ever few hours. ....and i think back all of this really started because my chest ached and i started to worry about a heartattack...im not the healthiest, do not exercise, and have not been eating much of anything because i just cant stand to eat when im a shaking disaster..so the only time i ate a good amount was on the xanax or ativan, calmed me enough to eat. So...everyday for me is like this...i wake up and im OK while im groggy, and then my mind starts up.. I start to feel a weird chest feeling, sometimes achey, sometimes a cold feeling , or burning or hot, or a small weight, and thats sets me off... i get red and sweaty palms very face once i start thinking about it, and restless. I dont want to get out of bed because im terrified. although i do notice my chest bothers me less when im up and moving. Idk if ive been so tense i pulled it or whats going on... still worries me. Anyway...i found a walkin clinic just two miles from my house yesterday (should have searched for them a long time ago) and he said to come on in, that they take my insurance. I get in my car...and im shaking, just terrified to move and shaking, burning in my chest and stomach.. and all of a sudden a pause and hot flush through my head, chest and body. I tried to shake it off because i knew help was just so close! I started to drive and my foot was bouncing all over the gas petal and i felt a pressure in my head and i got quesy... I ended up over by my ER!! (just about a block away) NOO!! and parked in their lot having a panic attack. I sat there for 5 hours in agony, waves of terror, and i couldnt even walk in, and didnt want too..knowing id get hooked up to the damn monitor with the beeping, which i cant stand any longer, even scared of the bp cuff now. I even tried calling them and telling them im outside and i cant walk in. lol i ended up hanging up on them, thank god. I sat a bit longer, gritted my teeth and drive home. LUCKILY i called my father and told him i didnt make it to the walkin clinic...he interviened (sp) and called my brother to ask him to leave work and DRAG me to the walk in clinic. At first i fought it and then got in his truck and curled into a ball quivering and holding my tight chest. I got in quick...got vitals taken 98p and 134/82 bp, which i guess is good considering. I told him the story and he perscribed Xanax... VERY MUCH NEEDED!! and lexapro which i wont be able to get because its not covered by my insurance..ill worry about that once i get a few days worth of relief and rest. A whole perscription FINALLY, and even a refill...its a miracle. I really believed i was going to die from the stress my body has been going though. Took a xanax 20 mins ago and my body temp has dropped and my color has evened out some, and my racing thoughts are gone.
Im still a little concerned with my chest..hoping it just goes away, and my lifestyle the past month. I've lost so much weight and seem to have no muscle tone, and shake at the littlest of movement. Always wanted to be the weight im at now but i look like death....Severe Anxiety is a NIGHTMARE when you let it spiral.
Does anyone ever have alot of body burning during severe anxiety? It's almost like a burning in the veins...or chest, stomach, arms?? I never used to have this with anxiety...and man can i sweat...my palms get so wet, even itchy. If i put my hand out of a warm blanket im very aware of the cold air hitting my skin...guess ive become aware of every single body sensation.. sleeping on my arm wrong can cause a panic attack. Thats how bad its got.
I know this is very very long... oh well, besides a headache, and a sore shoulder....im sleepy and getting hungry! YAY! (and yes i know the benzo horror addiction stories, but i was on them before and did wonderfully for two years, took as needed once i got over the hump, and tapered off very slowly for a long period of time, no problems at all)
OK... :) Thats it for me... hope everyone is doing well.

Itchy palm under my thumb...really annoying :/





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