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Hi everyone, I am new to this Board and just felt like venting to people who understand what I'm going through and might help me out. Basically, I have had a terrible month with (what I hope) is health anxiety. Over the last month I have had the following symptoms:

abdominal pain
hip pain
back pain (lower mostly, but entire back at times)
dizziness
tingly in hands and feet
muscle tremors
"bubbly" feeling in legs
mind fog, not being able to concentrate, almost out of body feeling
chest pain
palpitations
bleeding between periods
constipation/diarreah
fatigue
feeling of throat closing up
many others I'm forgetting in this moment

I have been to multiple doctors and specialists and urgent care and the emergency room and have had the following tests done in the last 4 weeks (all normal):

ekg (2)
abdominal ct scan
pelvic exam
abdominal/pelvic ultrasound
blood tests -cbc, lyme, electrolytes
echocardiogram
24 hour holter monitor
MRI of lower lumbar
x-ray of cervical spine
nerve conduction test


My continued fears (in no particular order) are:

blood clot
cancer (bone, uterine, etc)
bladder/kidney problems
aneurysm
circulation problems
MS
reproductive disease
that I'm actually crazy

The only thing that any of these tests showed was bacterial vaginosis (sorry for being so descriptive), of which I actually had no symptoms and think was just a secondary random problem, took antibiotics. And the MRI showed a transitional verterbrae (fusion of pelvis and spine) which they said I would have had since birth and usually causes no problems. I have a follow up with an orthopedist in a month or so, but my all my symptoms don't make sense with just that. I have been given Zantac for acid reflus (which I hated and only took twice), ibuprofen for pain (doesn't work), lorazapam as needed.

I am OBSESSED with googling my symptoms. I told myself I wasn't going to do it all today and I already have about 12 times. I was in the emergency room until midnight last night thinking I had a kidney stone or something and they found nothing wrong with me and told me to follow up with my primary.

My biggest issue right now is I am leaving for an 11 day vacation to Jamaica on Sunday (obviously that's not a problem, I should be ecstatic), but I am CONVINCED there is something wrong with me and I will be sick in a third world country. I am honestly considering not going.

For the record, I recognize that I'm an anxious person. I worry incessantly about anything and everything. I am moody and irritable. My anxiety has waxed and waned through the years, have tried medication but never stuck with it. For the most part I can manage it and live my life, but this has been the month from hell! I honestly believe I have something physically wrong with me and that all these CANNOT be anxiety symptoms. I have nothing to feel anxious about, and like I said before, should actually be looking forward to my upcoming vacation (I am terrified of flying, but haven't really been thinking of that as I've been consumed with these health problems). The only thing that sort of works is to take a lorazapam, which doesn't make my symptoms go away completely, but just makes me feel a little calmer about it.

I feel like once you've been labeled with anxiety, doctors chalk all your symptoms up to that. The logical part of my brain tells me that I've had a billion tests and if there was anything seriously wrong with me, it would have been found. But the obsessive part of me doesn't trust the doctors and think they are missing something huge. This has started to affect my work and my marriage. My husband tries to be supportive, but he's starting to get frustrated. He doesn't understand why I can't trust all the doctors and millions of tests.

As I sit here, I'm having bad side and back pain. Trying to avoid taking a lorazapem as I only have a limited supply. Today I am convinced it is related to my reproductive organs, but my husband thinks I continually move on to other symptoms as things get ruled out (also I had a transvaginal ultrasound that was normal). I just don't understand how anxiety can cause so much pain. Ironically, I have been feeling much less anxious about my normal stuff (being a passenger in a car, worrying something bad is going to happen, etc) since these physical symptoms started and have basically consumed my life.

I understand I probably need to see a therapist, and plan to make an appointment after I return from vacation (if I go), but how do I deal with this in the meantime? How do you KNOW when physical symptoms are anxiety?

Sorry for the long post, thanks if you read all the way through. Just had to get all these thoughts out because I feel like nobody understands.





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