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Back Problems Message Board

Back Problems Board Index

Giving up on life?
May 6, 2007
Giving up on life......... That is what my mother told me I am doing today. She says she is 69 with a lot of problems and still works. I'm only 42. So I said to her, "so you think I should be working?". She says I am giving up on life. I told her it is the opposite. I'm in constant pain. I keep the house clean every day. I pick my son up from school. I try to have dinner ready. All stuff I didn't have energy to do when working. Don't get me wrong, she is a good mother. I was just very insulted. Of all people I thought she understood what I was going through. Other then the horrible post op fusion pain, I also have Narcolepsy. That has gotten very bad also. So even if the back was pain free, i have other issues. I barely function with the sleeping disorders. She also has Narcolepsy I believe although never tested. So I thought we had that bond where she understood. She doesn't even get dressed on weekends. I have chronic pain in my back and both elbows. I can barely keep my eyes open. I get dressed everyday. I go out and do what I can. I try to walk everyday. She has no clue. Her house is always messy. She thinks I just lay around all day. I'm just venting. I have enough stress waiting to hear about permanent disability and disability retirement from work. I've worked 23 years. Started when I was 20. It's not like I am a slacker. The last 4 years of work were very hard. I can hardly drive anymore with the Narcolepsy. I don't have the type where I pass out. I have the type where I am sleepy all the time. I take Amphetamines three times a day to stay awake. Everyday is a challenge. We have the type of relationship where I won't say anything about it unless she brings up again. She really did hurt my feelings though. It goes back to no one seeing my pain. I have pain patches and braces on each elbow. I have a TENS machine going every waking moment. All covered by clothes. So people look at me and think I look fine. Oh well. Thanks for listening. Everyone is always supportive. If I can't vent here then can't vent anywhere. LOL:)

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