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Back Problems Message Board

Back Problems Board Index

To Elaine & Donna: I now am having throat compression and I've been doing nothing but cry for days. This is all because that first doctor pushed me into physical therapy too soon, the fusion shifted (as it was NOT fused and the xray people and the doctor misread the xray, stating it WAS fused) and all the vertebre above it collasped. I am so devastated; the thought of another neck surgery at probably C3-4 makes me ill. I've already had C5-6 done so if the doctors fuse C3-4, what happens to C4-5, duh!!! That poor littel C4-5 disk will get so compressed it will herniate too. I am just ill inside and this didn't even need to happen because the fusion was done perfectly. It was the after care that took me out. I just can't stop crying over this. That neck surgery and the recovery was nasty. I always get sick after surgery and now what are we talking about--a three level fusion! Oh gosh, I'm so upset. Then there is my low back; whenever I try to walk, it feels like my guts are going to fall out on the floor. My feet are partly numb and now the numbness is spreading to the outside of my legs and my toes. Another poster said that was her symptoms just before drop foot and now she needs a brace to walk (it was Bowlin' mama, if you want to read her post, most likely down a ways, as it was early February). The next thing is loss of bowel and bladder control, per Bowlin' mama's doctor. The thing of it is, my doctor faxed my data to the neurosurgeon 10 days ago and I don't even have an appointment. I know I must keep the faith and I do have the faith; I just don't want to go through another surgery, possibly not only on my neck, but my low back. I am simply going through the release of all my emotions regarding this and next will be the acceptance. No matter what, I still feel so bad about all of this. My biggest crime was helping out with all the firewood and snow shoveling, during my husband's on and off illness for 22 years, of which the stupid V.A. would not give him the 100% disability and which put this family into poverty or just above. I hate the V.A. for not being reponsible for him and this family. He finally got the 100% last July. Now that we have a little money, I am too messed up to enjoy it. At 53 years old, I am shot!For the first time here, I am venting all my frustrations on this board. Sorry, but I guess it is now my turn to pour my heart out. Take care and thanks for listening, PatG

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