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Eating Disorder Recovery Message Board


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[QUOTE=Charlyssa]This is for both Janice and Dilemma -

I just want you both to know you have brought me joy, and have brightened my life. I just finished reading both your posts and I'm still smiling. I feel as tho I have added 2 more daughters. :) it's nearly 10 pm girls (where I live, anyway, which is NV) so I'm pooped...but, I promise I'll be back "on board" tomorrow to answer your posts. :yawn: Ooops, sorry for that. Old age!! Talk to you tomorrow!!

Hugs!!
Char :wave:[/QUOTE]Charlyssa, I have no words to describe you. Your words are beyond me. You are just fill of compliments. Like I said before, you are by far the kindest person I have ever met. Absolutely amazing. Thank you for that.
[quote]I should say right up front that I dare not tell you what you should be eating and how many calories. I'm just a mom, not a Dr. I would THINK 1500 calories might be about right for a teen, especially if you're active, heck, maybe even a bit more. I wish I could remember what I read somewhere about how to calculate this according to your weight...but I don't, sorry!! If you lost weight before, tho, just do what you did then. Just nothing drastic, because you don't want to get sick. Maybe the best thing to do is just eat less of everything you would normally eat. I've heard that if you are "full" when you leave the table, you have eaten too much. And no snacks. Or soda pop, unless it's diet. Sometimes simple changes like that are all you need to do...and no desserts, of course. GASP!!!

My youngens are a son, 29, and a daughter, 26...and I don't look old enough to have kids that old. I usually lie about their ages.
[/quote]1500? I go far beyond that!! :eek: Worst of all, I'm not active at all. I participate in absolutely no sports, and when I do, it's only for a few minutes at a time. I honestly cannot recall my eating habits during the summer that had caused me to lose weight. I just exercised an awful lot. And I was never bored or anything, so I really had no reason to eat more than I needed to. I don't know, I just felt like I was just on a row and high-spirited at the time. How I wish I can find that again. Soda I have no problem with, but it's the snacks that get to me. I can't get my hands off sweets-- candy, cookies, and the sort. It's yummy, haha.
[quote]We had chicken last night, actually. My hub ate the dumplings, I didn't. Just chicken, cottage cheese and slad for me. Diets are not fun, and I soooo fear I will not be able to stand it much longer!!!![/quote]Chickens are our friends, too. :) But don't fear that you might not be able to stand it much longer! I know you will. We ALL know you will. You're on the right track and you're heading in the right direction, which means, you will, absolutely positively succeed sometime in the future. I guess these things just takes TIME. If only we can fast-forward without aging, huh?
[quote]
argh!! i'm so mad at myself today! the day was going great, the weather was amaaaaaaazing, and then at dinner i fell into my old habits again... i do try to put only healthy things on my plate, and i do try to stop at one helping, but then the little voice in my head has to go and ruin everything!!! it just won't keep quiet, and i feel like i should be chained or handcuffed to my chair so that i won't get up and get something else. actually, they might need to bolt the chair to the ground so as to prevent my dragging it up to the food . then after dinner, i had the urge to eat more. it's always after i overeat a little that i want to eat more. it's like i can't even think about food without wanting some, you know? and that's a really bad thing, cuz most of the time, i AM thinking about food. so i went to go get cookies and chocolate and now my teeth hurt and my stomach is yelling at me. *sigh*. i know i need to try harder. and i know i should stay positive, but sometimes i just don't want to. no, i take that back. i DO want to, but how do i make my actions and thoughts agree with what's in my heart? how can i do what's best for myself and my body? . it's so silly. here i am giving advice on how to avoid bingeing, but when it comes to myself, i just go for it. i'm walking up to get more food in the dining hall, or i'm walking to the store to buy food, and on my way, i'm thinking, you know you don't need this. you're not even hungry. you don't even LIKE the food. WHY ARE YOU GOING UP AND GETTING MORE?? WHY ARE YOU PUTTING IT IN YOUR MOUTH? but i ignore all of that, and it's like i'm almost eating to shut the thoughts up. but i just want to know what's wrong with me, and what is making me WANT to eat in the first place. it's soooo hard. especially here at school, where i feel no one really understands. and i keep up a pretty good pretense, always smiling, and being helpful. but inside, i'm all questions. and i feel so guilty. why am i not happy? content? i have so much. a good family, parents who love me, an amazing older sister, friends both here and at home who care about me, i'm in college--learning and being exposed to so much and have so many opportunities. so why do i constantly feel like i need to fill myself up? why am i never satisfied with myself? do i even KNOW what i want? . don't worry, i start therapy next week--my first appointment is wednesday. and i'm a bit scared. but at the same time, can't wait to get started. it's like a part of me doesn't want to let go of the bad habits, you know? but then every other part is dying to break free!! it's hard for me to just go on a diet. i mean, i do want to lose this excess weight. but last year i had trouble even then. i lost a lot of weight but still wasn't "satisfied", i look at pictures now and think, wow i looked great. yet at the time, i still thought i was "fat". actually, not fat but also not thin enough. it was getting to be a different form of bad habit. but now i wish i had it back. no, i don't--i just want to be normal again, whatever that means. because no matter how big or small we get, nothing will make us happy until we love ourselves inside and out. i know that now. do you think working on the "self-love" and getting that will get rid of the eating problem automatically? perhaps it's wishful thinking. but i just want to stop having these negative thoughts. [/quote]Emma- my goodness. You must be my long lost twin somewhere-- only you're five years older. ;) But anyway, I can relate to everything you said. Everything. Your monologe has sadden me and touched me greatly. Don't be mad at yourself. It's okay. Just get up, and try again. It's no use to get angry at yourself 'cause that'll only make you feel worse and that can't be healthy now, can it? [quote]thanks for your advice. and don't starve yourself!! . anyhow, if only i could limit myself to one plate. and read above about the eating slowly thing. maybe if i tell myself i'm just doing it for fun. hmm... why don't we do that? you, me, and char. let's tell ourselves that just for this next week, we're going to try and eat as slowly as possible just for the heck of it. and at the end of each meal or snack, if we've really eaten as slowly as possible--i'm talking 22 chews per bite and a 5 second pause between to sip water--we'll give ourselves something (a dollar, a sticker, a hug). then at the end of the week, we can treat ourselves to something bigger--like a massage or a hot tub. (haha... i only wish i could get either of those). but you know what i mean, right? if we think of it as a game, it might not be as torturous. [/quote]Wow, some game, haha. I'll be surprised if I didn't quit after the first round. It's like the opposite Hungry Hungry Hippos.





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