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Eating Disorder Recovery Message Board

Eating Disorder Recovery Board Index

Hi all! I'm hoping to gain some support and someone to talk to through what I'm dealing with right now. I'm 28 weeks pregnant and over the last few weeks, I've regressed back to binging and purging. I know this absolutely must stop. However, will all the stress I'm under in my life right now I'm feeling out of control. My husband and I are in the process of divorce. Our home is up for sale, but not selling. I'm at the end of the academic school year (I teach special education) and wish every day that school would be over for this year. With a new baby on the way, trying to raise a 2 1/2 year old that already is a handful and the stress of my relationship/work/home not selling/finances I'm feeling overwhelmed and exhausted. Tonight I had a huge dinner (chicken, vegetables, cottage cheese, ice cream, Twizzlers, animal crackers) and I'm trying to keep myself from throwing it all up (for the sake of the growing baby inside of me). I want to give the child inside of me the right nutrition it needs to grow. But, as you can tell by the meal I ate this evening, I'm eating more than I probably should. I'm afraid of gaining over 40 pounds in this pregnancy (I've gained over 20 so far). I've been suffering from bulimia for about 14 years. I've received treatment many times and have had at least 1 good year of eating throughout the 14 years of suffering. With my 1st pregnancy, I only binged a couple of times. With this pregnancy, I've binged about 10 times in the last 4 weeks. I want to stop. However, I feel so upset and refuse to go back on medication for depression until after the birth of this child. I hope I can make it through these next 12 weeks of pregnancy and hopefully the baby will be born healthy. From there on, I can't wait to go back on medication (Celexa and Welbutrin) and hopefully not face a life of constant binging and purging.

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